A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been reading on this website for the past couple of months and I've noticed a lot of posts concerning stretch marks lately. It's got me thinking a lot. I've always been pretty confident with my body but I do have tons of stretch marks. I got them when I was like 15 on my butt and boobs, which is kind of embarrassing and on my stomach and hips from my one pregnancy a couple of years ago. Now my boyfriend (the guy I have my child with) had told me long ago he doesn't really mind them, but is he telling me the truth? I see girls all of the time who seem they have perfect skin/bodies and I wonder if my boyfriend ever looks at them and wishes he had a girl with that kind of body instead. It never bothered me until recently I guess and now I can't get it off my mind. It sucks because it's not like I can do anything about them. I've now started to wonder if he looks at them during sex, or if he gets turned off by them. I might just be paranoid.Anyways, how do guys really feel about them? Please tell me the truth.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2015): Too bad that so many husbands don't feel like the one described below and would prefer to look at young porn stars than the bodies of the mothers of their children. Having come out of a marriage where that is exactly what happened and no, I wasn't overweight. I simply had stretch marks and sagging breasts from carrying his babies and he preferred a bodies that didnt have those things as he saw them as flaws .
So yes some men care. I also have a friends who's husband complains.
What a sad world we live in
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2015): So the male poster below believes only thin women are atrractive now . Women just can't win can we!
Actually , we can win!
The only way is to realise that what men thinks does not matter one bit. Men today have access to a never ending supply of perfect bodies fitting any calculation gbey type in to their computers. NO real life women witb stretch marks or boobs that don't morph from one size to the next each day will ever satisfy them so just forget worrying about men and what they want!
Worry only about you and what makes you feel happy and healthy in your body.
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A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (14 February 2015):
Every single woman has stretch marks. Even models. They just get makeup to cover them up. Thin women may have less, but they do have them. Plus, guys have them too. Often on their back or their butt. It literally doesn't matter. They fade over time and honestly, bodies are bodies; everyone has imperfections. If your boyfriend says he doesn't mind them, believe him. He's with you, isn't he? I got freaked out about them when I first got them at age 15, but now I'm in my twenties I literally do not give a shit and I don't know anyone either who actually cares about them.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2015): My opinion as a guy, the most important factor that draws my attention in a woman is her face. If I like her face, I like all the rest. Stretch marks, freckles,small bust, big bust, small butt, big butt,tallness or shortness are unimportant.one last point also being attractive is more important than being beautiful and attractiveness can be aquired by being stylish, healthy,thin, and knowing what kind of makeup, hair style suit you best.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2015): The female anon who said stretch marks fade whe. You
Lose weight and that this happened to her!!!
Incorrect!
Yes, stretch marks fade but this has to do with time and not weight lose ! The fact she lost weight and they faded at the same time was a coincidence
About a week ago we had a very uninformed responder saying some ignorant things in another post about a woman suffering sagging skin and it is important that correct Information is given here especially when health and weight related . This responders posts were extremely hurtful to
Mothers in particular and made worst by the fact she was a woman herself!
Stretch marks fade irrespective of weight lose ( assuming no further weight is gained ) and losing weight will have ZERO effect on existing stretch marks , except in some cases especially after pregnancy where it will exaggerate the loose skin.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (14 February 2015):
 I never had them until I was pregnant. My husband doesn't care one bit. I was more concerned about my surgery scars. My husband doesn't care one bit! He was more concerned with the end of the after-surgery sex ban than any scars or marks I had.
I asked him if he cared about the stretch marks before, and he said he's not looking at stripes, he's looking at curves and swells. heh.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2015): I don't know. I have stretch marks around my hips from when I was a pre teen and had put on a lot of weight. They looked really bad when I was fat. They looked like red/purple claw marks on my skin. Fortunately I lost the weight as a teen and got skinny. When I did, the stretch marks became like skin colored. So they camouflage more. I was always really active and had a pretty nice body but had a complex about my stretch marks, especially as a teenager, which even though they became less noticeable, they never went away. As I've gotten older I feel more comfortable in my skin.
As I have gotten older they are still visible but they've kind of faded even more. I have never had a guy take issue with my stretch marks. It has never affected my love life. Neither as a teen nor as an adult.
I love looking pretty and being in shape. Even so, I have always known that looks are not everything. And nobody is perfect. Personality can take you really far and can really get you noticed. If you take good care of yourself, and a guy finds you pretty and on top of it, thinks you are cool and sweet, just simply likes you, I don't think that stretch marks are going to hurt you.
However, stretch marks aside, when you don't take care of your body and you don't watch your weight, it can appear like you just don't care about yourself. And when you look in the mirror, you may not like what you see. People can see through that. And to others, it can appear rather careless. And it can also magnify your so called "flaws."
I have been turned down for dates because I smoked cigarettes. But never because I have stretch marks. Which again goes back to my point. It is important to TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. Your body and what you do to it is a reflection of you. Smoking is bad. Not watching your weight is bad. Being at a healthy weight is just as important as not smoking.
I believe in taking care of yourself. I believe that if you look in the mirror and you don't like what you see, then you should do something about it. And when you are trying to improve yourself, you should do what fits you, in particular. Not somebody else. You are unique like a snowflake. You are never going to look like anybody else. So your fitness goals and your beauty goals should be tailored to what looks good on you. Work with what you got.
The stretch marks are out of your control. But taking care of your body is something you can control. And that is what will get you noticed and what matters in the long run. And that will make you feel good about yourself and will make the stretch marks (which will fade and minimize once you lose weight) not seem so important.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (14 February 2015):
I've been with two women that had stretch marks. Nothing major, but they weren't invisible.
I didn't give a single shit.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (14 February 2015):
 I suppose there are men out there somewhere that would notice them, but they would be in the minority.
Take your boyfriend's word on this one, he speaks the truth.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2015): Before people get on here and say how so much cAn be done to help them which happened in a pee opus post where many are ignorant and believe advertisers claims , take it from someone who spent a lot on the very best dermatologist and experts .
Cres and lotions will help in moisturising the skin only but CANNOT ever repair the torn elastin fibres , think of a piece of elastic snapping . They have effectively seperated and cannot knit bAck together ( this is how the dermatologist described rx it to me)
In time they fade but that's it . The loose skin can only be removed !!! Never toned or 'fixed'
The answer for me was surgery ) where I had three kilos of loose skin that had been stretched by pregnancy and covered in stretch marks removed . As the dr said. There was basically no fat , just skin that would only get worse with weight lose
But honestly I think if it wernt so bad the answer os simply ... Acceptance and if it's a problem for him then he isn't the right man for you!
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A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (14 February 2015):
A lot of guys care, a lot of guys don't care.
I personally don't care. Pretty sure (189%) that he is not thinking about your stretch marks during sex.
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A
female
reader, Midnight Shadow  +, writes (14 February 2015):
 Honestly, what does it matter? There will always be guys who don't like/accept them, but they'd be hard pushed to find women without them at some point in their lives.
Your boyfriend says he doesn't mind them and, quite frankly, you should believe him because he's still with you and not use this site, where people come to air out their issues, as suggestions for your relationship ;)
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