A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Well there's this girl I really like. She is rather shy.I have taken her out once and we both had a good time. She's been rather quiet recently but theres been a lot going on in my life and her life. What I would like to do is get some indication on whether I am wasting my time before I get more wrapped up in my head thinking about her.Only way I can basically think of doing this is ask "am I wasting my time?" however this could cause the wrong reaction.Any help would be appreciated.Thank you
View related questions:
shy Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, xTheAlmightyDuckx +, writes (10 September 2012):
 Asking a question like that is really the worst way to go. Girls don't want boys to just give up on them, they want boys to try there hardest with them even if they are maybe being a little bit difficult.
As you said she has alot going on in her life at the moment and so do you, which could be why shes so queit and could be why you may feel like your getting no where.
Unfortuetly being shy aswell doesn't help, its hard to tell what people are thinking when they are shy as they just kinda "close up".
I am a rather shy person in situations and i must say i do hate it when people just overlook me or won't make an effort with me because i'm not all loud and happy like most people.
I think the best way to go, is to be very subtle, chat to her, it doesn't have to be face to face, through text maybe? I find when someones shy doing it that way helps. Ask her if she has any plans? Maybe invite her to go out with you again or for you too to meet up some time this week?
If she ses shes busy then, don't automatically become down hearted, ask her why shes busy and what shes up too maybe the week after?
I know it may seem tedious at times but keep trying to put in a little bit of effort every now and again, don't get your head all wrapped up thinking about her either, think of each day you spend with her or each time you talk to her that anything could happen, it could be bad or good so that way you wull be prepared with whether she likes you or she doesn't.
I will say if it does get to the point where all the effort is one sided and she kinda stops responding, then ovbiously its time to find someone else to make abit of effort with as she may not have the same feelings for you as you do for her.
And if for instance you invite her out and she turns you down..lets say 4 times in a row, then maybe talk to her and ask her if shes into you at all, or just agree to stay friendly with eachother and find someone else who feels the same about you and will appreciate the effort you make.
Good Luck x
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (10 September 2012):
 DON'T ask a NEGATIVE question... such as you suggest. Instead, ask a POSITIVE question... such as: "Say, have you got any plans for the next 25 or so years? 'Cuz I'm sweet on you, and would like to spend a lot of time together...."
DON'T give her a chance to ease out and dump you on YOUR initiative!!!!!
Good luck....
...............................
|
