A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:in the past ive been told by most people that im ugly and i believe them. ive got a horrible face, a huge nose, horrible eyebrows n im fat too. but now there is 1 lad (who is a lil older than me) who texts me a lot and tells me he thinks im gorgeous n that he likes me. hes good looking so i dont think its possible for him to fancy someone ugly like me! even though he swears he fancies me, im still not sure. could he be joking?
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2008): this guy obviously likes you..who cares what other people think has it occured to you that their just jealous..anyway it doesnt matter what is one the outside it matters whats on the inside. i mean no one is going to go out with a really good looking girl if she has no personality and is a downright b***h r they??
this guy obviously thinks your beautiful
ever heard the song im beautiful no matter what they say.
life is cruel and ignore the idiots thats my personal motto. these people who call you ugly are obviously crazy.
A
female
reader, Nikkii Babyee +, writes (30 April 2008):
 heyah sweetie :) right just gota say one thing first...do not listen to what any body tells you to put u down! for all you know they could be jealous of u! but just because other people say yer ugly does not mean that everyone assumes this! this guy could think yer wonderful and amazin and he could see you in a totally different light fom other people! some guys can really surprise us like that! i was with my last bf and i wouldnt be the skinniest ov girls but my ex woaw he was hott a footie player with a 6 pac an totally stunning i used to think that a lot of people would think ugh wats a stunner lyk him doin with someone like me! but i realised that its what that 1 person thinks of you and what that one person sees in you that makes them like you! seriously if this guys sayn yer gorjus he probli mesns it :) give it a try hun it will really help yer self confidence :)0x*
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for your post Cindy X
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female
reader, Cindy303  +, writes (4 April 2008):
 Your post made a tear come to my eye. I know how you feel. When I was in high school I was nothing special. I never dated and never really had any guy tell me he liked me. I never even got asked out to the prom!!!!! I learned as I got older that beauty comes within and radiates through-out making you beautiful in every way. You have a wonderful frienship in this guy who likes you. Dont listen to what the others there say to you. People put down others when they are not feeling good themselves. Being negative makes them feel better while bringing down others around them with nasty comments. Please ignore them. Enjoy building something with this guy who texts you. I hope you dont think that he is just saying this. He is being open and honest with you. I really wish you the best. You deserve it. Best Wishes, Cindy
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A
male
reader, 17Irish17 +, writes (4 April 2008):
I know how you feel. When I was your age, I couldnt get a date if I were in a female prison with a handful of pardons! Although I have never met you I bet you are prettier than you think and your "friends" who said you were "ugly" are just being mean and imature.
Believe it or not, not all guys look for the "super model" type, and want to be with someone who is a "super model" on the inside.
Dont second guess yourself. You have a lot to give in this world. You just need a little confidence.
And oh by the way...it's the ugliest girls who usually turn into the most beautiful of women:)
Good luck to you...beautiful!
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2008): Honey, I'm sure you're not ugly. Never let anyone tell you that you are ugly, because God made every one on this planet beautiful in his eyes, and you are no exception.
Now, to answer to your question.. This is a tough one. He's either saying these things because he genuinely fancies you and is thinking of persuing a relationship with you, or unfortunately, he's having you on. Sadly, there are people out there who would do this type of thing. But my instinct tells me that he's genuinely interested. First of all, I think you should maybe start talking to him a little more. But don't throw yourself into anything too much, because if he sees you're getting dependant on him or attached, someone's going to get hurt! And most likely, that person will be you. So take things slowly, and don't get too ahead of yourself.
Don't put yourself down and think that he must be kidding - I'm such you're a lovely girl with some great qualities, and he's obviously seen that. Good luck :]
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for the answer Namatjira! i have spelt your name right havent i? x
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male
reader, Namatjira +, writes (4 April 2008):
First of all I think nearly every person in the world at your age thinks they do not look good. It is a normal part of growing up and the fact that your body and personality are going through big changes. So with that in mind I think you need to start accepting that your image of yourself is probably not accurate.
As for most people telling you that you are ugly, those that do are either winding you up, uncertain about their own appearance and making fun of you helps them to feel better about themselves, or just plain cruel. Do not believe them. I have travelled to a very large number of countries and seen many people from different cultures and I can tell you that the number of very ugly people in this world is small indeed.
The real quality I think that makes a big difference between someone being ugly and being ordinary is often their personality. If you are a nice kind person, interested in others, and to use a word going out of fashion these days, nice. Then that will always show through. Some of the best women I have ever known would not win a beauty pageant but when they enter a room all look towards them and they never have a problem getting dates or making friends with people you would like as friends. The main reason for this is just that they have really amazing personalities and are just good to spend time with. They have the kind of beauty that gets better as they get older just like the best wines do.
How you think about yourself is important. If you recognise that some parts of you are not perfect and that some parts are (both personality and physically) and like the kind of person that you are, then this will show to other people. Especially those whose opinions matter.
The fact that this boy thinks highly of you shows that he falls into one of two categories. Either he is secretly being cruel (unfortunately some people like teasing others who are not self confident) or he is one of those rare guys who sees past the obvious and recognises the shining person underneath. Regardless of his motivation, believe him that you are someone who is worth liking a lot and that your bad points are not so bad as you think. Your nose is not as big as you think it is (I have 4 daughters and they all thought that they had big noses at your age), your eyebrows can be trimmed and you can learn how to do this very nicely yourself (try not to experiment on this one but ask the help of a beautician), and you can lose weight (do not bother so much about dieting, just eat what you know is healthy and cut out snacks except as a rare treat eat a little less and walk or swim or ride a bike, anything to increase your exercise each day). You will transform yourself in your own eyes. Do not go overboard with everything. Keep your weight at a sensible level which is usually a little bit more than the charts say. Learn how to dress for your body style and personal taste. It is not hard to do but does require some courage the first few times you go out in a completely new clothing style. Don't worry guys go through all this too but they generally do less to deal with it.
Just take all change slowly and do not do it too fast. Over time you will recognise that you have transformed into someone you like.
Be brave little bird and all will be well. Feel free to message me if you think I can help with some moral support and encouragement, or you could message mandy7 on this forum who I have seen give good advice to other teenage girls.
Good luck.
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