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female
,
anonymous
writes: Hi people, just a quick question, how can I keep my relationship strong and steady? My partner and I have been through a lot recently. We've got through it now but argue every 5-10 days. We dont ever get nasty or violent but i get mad then stroppy and we have to have serious talks. I just want us to enjoy each other's company. We love each other and we were wanting to move in together but these talks and strops have taken their toll and we've postponed it. I'm not the one to get so stroppy about things. So how can i end these silly rows about the same silly things?
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female
reader, hannieseds  +, writes (18 September 2006):
 Hey girl,
We had this problem but I found that the thing that works best is when either of you find yourself getting heated or frustrated, just walk away. Say to your BF "I need a time out, i'll be back in an hour so we can talk about this calmly". Go out for a drive and have a good hard think about why this argument has happened and what you want to say to your BF when you get back. Encourage him to do the same when he feels himself getting angry. When you come back later, you will find you have both had time to calm down and think so you can then talk to each other in a loving way and get your feelings across. Honestly, it really does work!
Remember - relationships are like glass - It is sturdy, tough, beautiful and clear when taken care of, but if it is mistreated or mishandled it can end up scratched, cracked or even broken. So always choose what you say carefully and at the end of the day, your love for each other is all that matters and a year from now the argument/disagreement you are having will mean nothing!
A
female
reader, Tine  +, writes (18 September 2006):
 well how about trying to avoid arguments by just not talking about the things that you disagree on...
can u elaborate a bit what are these arguments all over?? Is there certain topics that you can't stand it when he talks about them?? or is he doing things to annoy you all the time??
when you are arguing i always find that if you take a deep breath and count to ten, to allow yourself to calm down then you'll not have a strop or throw a fit towards him. Its good that you dont get nasty or violent but think to yourself, how come?? You obviously know your boundaries your fights, to when it gets to a point when you will get nasty or violent and thats how you've managed to stop yourselves from doing so. All relationships have fights and arguments every now and again, it wouldnt be normal if you didnt.
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