A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi im a 34 yr old male thats married with 2 kids, one is 16 nearly 17 and the other is only 14 months. I have a full time job although i'm lucky enough to be one of the bosses so i get more time off than others and normally only work from 8.30am-4.30pm, it pays very well. But anyway heres my problem me and wife are very commited to each other and have always found it abit hard to make time for our sex life. Fortunatly our eldest daughter actually goes to her friends house every fortnight and sometimes probably once/twice a week on school holidays, she also sometimes goes to her mamars and take our 14 months old daughter with her but doesn't do that very often only when it convenient. We love having them here of course but it bothers us that she may walk in on us if we have sex,we have before when she was here but it wasn't very enjoyable becuase we had to be carefull she didn't hear although now shes older there has been a few times when she has joked about it and acted like she doesn't care what we do but we still can't enjoy it like we could if we were in our own. I suppose now that our other daughter is starting to get older she might hear. I do wonder if it will all go away in afew years as before we had Megan(the youngest daughter) we managed to carry on with regular sex. Please help we really need advice and quickly its alot harder to deal with than we thought it would be at first.How can we get over this fear and get back to the sex life we used to have?
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male
reader, home_land  +, writes (26 March 2007):
 helloyou have to make a time table for your kids when they go to sleep , ater 10 you can make love with your wife .and if your kids pass by ignore that ´. its normal thing.good luck
A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (24 March 2007):
 Hi,
First, put a lock on your door, even if it is just a toggle bar lock. Children can learn to knock and you are not being a bad parent by doing this. If the house is yours, make sure there is insulation in the walls (this can be done even after the walls are up - and even if the house is not yours, it's an household improvement so I don't think the landlord would mind). Put a draft stopper at the base of the door. If you are relatively discreet, you will not be scarring your children - even if they do hear or suspect that you and your wife are making love. I would presume that at their age, the 16 and 17 year old would understand that sex is part of a normal marriage. If the problem is that it inhibits you or your spouse, then that is a different situation. You will have to make plans or hire a sitter. Our kids (now 22-26) would occasionally make a remark back then that would embarrass us, but I think this probably happens in most families! They both seem to be well-adjusted and comfortable with sex, so I don't think it warped them in any way! Hope this helped.
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