A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Well I will do my best to make this short and to the point but if I ramble on to much feel free to stop reading ..lol..but anywho I was with this guy for 2 years and I thought I met the "love of my life" I made this guy my everything. I did whatever I could to make him happy. Well he broke up with me because he hated that he did not see me like that because I was really focused on my education and I stopped making him the center of my world. Because before that I would ALWAYS miss class jus to go and chill with my baby and would go see him A LOT but nothing seemed to be enough for him he always but focus on things that I did not do. So make a long story short I found some news and I went with my gut and caught him cheating on me at his house..But me being blind in love I stayed with him hopeing to make it work. So now I just found out that he was STILL playing me while we were together with another girl without me even knowing now that one hurt soooo bad when I found out. I mean how can someone you thought loved you hurt you so bad. I was already hurting from the death of my father and always looked at him for comfort and to find out I was being played all along killed me inside..and to find out he loves this girl..WTF....he was with me and sayin he love me and all in love with me and like 1 wk when he broke up with he loves this girl...damn!!! whhheewwww that was long but advice please cuz this hurts
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2010): some people end up hurting the ones that they do love or at least care about because they are still selfish at heart or because ironically they are stupid enough to think they are protecting their loved one's feelings by lying and covering things up. and then things snowball and get out of hand. Sometimes people are too afraid to hurt others by honestly telling the truth up front because they can't stand to see the other person cry because it makes them feel bad. Or they are afraid of other consequences of hurting you. Either way they are still being selfish, they are trying to save themselves from the discomfort of guilt if they were to tell you the truth and hurt you honestly.
So they try to keep up an act saying they are protecting your feelings meanwhile while doing what they really want to do which involves other people, and thinking what you don't know won't hurt you and if the objective is to not hurt you thus the cover ups and lies continues and then takes on a life of its own in order to maintain itself.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2010): Some people are just nasty and downright selfish. Other times people hurt other people for reasons that even they can't explain.
This guy sounds like he just took advantage of you selfishly because he has no respect for you.
This doesn't sound like love at all, it sounds like deception and selfishness.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (9 November 2010):
 The key word here is "thought ". You THOUGHT he loved you so much.Very often we think what we want to think, and we see what we want to see, in spite of any evidence to the contrary.
Here we have a selfish guy that does not find anything wrong in making you miss your classes just so that you can go keep him company.
A guy who laps up all the affection and attention he receives, -but ,the moment you don't put him center stage in your life , because of serious reasons- he sulks and distances himself.
If you think this is love, perhaps you need to review a bit your ideas about love.
I know you feel bad now and I am not saying this to make you feel worse. But it's a hard fact of life which all of us have trouble accepting : we have responsibility for our choices and actions, and we have responsibility for operating choices and making actions that will contribute to our happiness rather than destroying it.
Very seldom people is so astute , evil and cunning to give us a total misreprentation of their personality- very seldom the bomb they drop on us is a totally shocking,out of character surprise. In general, there have been several little signs and hints pointing in that direction, and we
chose to ignore them or minimize them.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (9 November 2010):
 You were distraught from your father's death and he took advantage of how emotionally reliant you were on him. I am afraid you were merely relying on the wrong person. Try and move on from him, if you can, get him out of your life and ignore him.
I hope that helps.
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