A
female
age
41-50,
*s.caramelhips26
writes: My boyfriend is a good man" but there's one problem he dosen't clean" he has time and energy for sex but not for cleaning how can I turn my 80% good man into a full 100? please help! Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2010): Nobody's perfect. Be grateful he is as close as he is.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2010): Doesn't clean what? Himself, the house, his car...
If he doesn't clean himself, you need to discuss his hygene issue.
If he doesn't clean the spaces he lives in, then that's a different issue.
Men are usually pretty motivated by sex and sexual activity. If you don't mind using that as a motivator, then go for it. I however don't think this is the best method becasue he will tend to want it anytime he does one of these chores...
I firmly believe that people don't change for anyone other than themselves. If you want him to change something, he has to want to do it for himself. If he changes for you, it will be temporary.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (22 March 2010):
Drag him into the shower EVERYTIME before sex, maybe he will get the hint. If not, tell him.
Also.. word of advice.....
Don't expect men to read your mind, they can't.. AT ALL.
Last but not least, you can't always change a man. They are what they are. Make the best of it.
If you mean cleaning around the house... I may have misunderstood your post lol
Then sit down with him and make out a chore list. It's pretty easy.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (22 March 2010):
Some men don't realize it and they need to be told. You dolled up for him and he does not care at all about his appearances.
Maybe, you need to take the bath together and you can scrubbed him all over...LOL!
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (22 March 2010):
Most men dont clean, and if that is his only flaw then you should count yourself very very lucky! Look at all of the relationship problems on this site - and if your only problem is that he does not clean well you have nothing to complain about!
If the cleaning really bothers you and if you are both working full time, yet he leaves all the housework to you then just sit him down and say that because you are both equally busy he needs to help out around the house a bit more. Make a list of jobs you would like him to do, and when they should be done - hopefully he should pay attention and help you out a bit more. But if he works full time and you do not work - well you cant really expect him to come home after a full day at work and then help you out around the house. As long as you are both doing your fair share, and have worked out a good equal balance depending on your lifestyle and work commitments then you should be fine.
But really, I hope you do read the other posts on this site from other men and women asking for help with their relationships, as it should put into perspective how trivial your problem is in comparison. If his only flaw is not cleaning then count yourself lucky and just accept that this is the way he is, if everything else is good in the relationship then you cant really complain about this.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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