A
female
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anonymous
writes:i just posted the question "I finally got with Pete! Problem is I've never had a boyfriend before, so dont know how to make us an adorable couple!" around 2 days ago, but i honestly need as much advice as possible.So we've been spending sooooooo much time together in the past 2 days, but the problem is im a British-Indian and (not being rascist) hes white. [were still both in highschool]I dont know what my parents are going to say about him, they arent the kind of people that would not allow me to see him as ive spoken to them about dating people from a different race before, but i dont think they really expected it.I dont know how tell them about it, and they have alot of problems in their life like financial problems, etc...[not relationship problems]so i wouldnt want to cause more drama.Please help...xI dont want to lose him for anything!Thankyou...x
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHey,
Thankyou for all your help.
It worked out fine! My parents are ok with it.
I wouldn't have had the courage to tell them if it wasn't for your help.
Thanks again...x
A
male
reader, soulmasseur +, writes (10 September 2006):
Tell them right NOW about this guy. Be frank. They better know about it a.s.a.p. or a time will come when you are caught between Mr. devile and seven deep blue seas! Afetr all, we are in 21st century and I do not think people still are as hard and fast when it comes to the racial stuff and mingling with those that do not "look like you" as 100 years ago. It's exciting to see 'how' other people different from you live and think. DON'Y WORRY, BE HAPPY!
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A
female
reader, hugs2muchgal  +, writes (9 September 2006):
 hey i dont think your parents will mind too much.
im actually half white and half indian, so i think the combo of white and indian is as cool as it gets!
how traditional are your parents? enough that color really bothers them?
since you are just in high school your parents probabaly wont care too much about the guys race but how good he is in school and will he distract you and stuff, thats what my parents care most about. (im a highschooler too)
also remember you have been with him TWO days, that is not that much. your parents will perceive this as puppy love and most likely not take it seriously at all (my father is indian and takes no relarionship of mine seriously)
if you are willing to risk a fight with your parents for this guy then talk to them. see what their opinions are, and if they don't want you dating a white guy, start bringing pete up in conversations slowly and building him up so much so that when they meet him they might not mind.
good luck with everything, you can always personally ask me for anymore help if you ever need it.
tell me how it works out
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (9 September 2006):
 I think you should just tell them you are dating a guy from another racial background. If you think it is appropriate then bring him around for tea sometime to 'meet the parents'. Secrecy worries parents because they wonder what you have got to hide, so best tell them now before someone sees you together and it gets back to them. If you are mature enough to get your new romance out on the kitchen table then they should see you are mature enough to make your own relationship choices. You don't need to create drama - just say you have a boyfriend and answer their questions. I am sure they won't care too much about his colour...more about if he is a nice guy who will treat their daughter nicely.
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A
female
reader, midgetgem +, writes (8 September 2006):
 I'm a white woman and I've dated Indian men and have many Indian friends so have seen your problem from a number of sides!
You don't mention how strict your parents are and a hell of a lot hinges on that.
What are their expectations of you/who you should date etc.
In my experience it's really not as simple as just telling your parents 'hey, I'm dating a white guy'.
Please tell us more.
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