A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi im 15. me and my boyfriend have been together now for 3 months. he has just left schooland he is 16. he has mentioned sex a few times but i have kept sayin i am too young and i want to wait. he just says ok but if i do not have sex with him will he finish our relationship?Also i have this friend...she is bubbly but her personality can get rather annoying at times. the film high school musical is all she sings..but the truth is she cant even sing. she thinks she can sing. how can we tell her that her singin is getting us al rather annoyed? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2007): he needs to respect you and he obviously doesnt, its your body and you call the shots, i think its time to find a better boyfreind, you can do much better.
A
female
reader, xox +, writes (15 May 2007):
hey if he can't wait he obviously doesn't like or repect you enough anyway so if he can't he it would mean he's a bit of a wanker anyway so don't worry about it. amd your mate well if she can't sing just tell her to shut up in a jokey way i can't sing and my mates frequantly remind me of this and i still think their awesome so i wouldn't worry about it
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (15 May 2007):
 It is a sure test of a relationship if you say no and he stays with you anyway. If he walks away you shouldn't feel bad as it would be his loss and definitely not yours! After all if sex is all he is interested in then surely he is not worthy??? As for your friend, well we all have people around us who do annoying things...my husband chews his nails when we watch TV and I keep threatening to cut off his fingers if he doesn't stop (amongst other things!) as the noise drives me crackers. However, he knows (thinks) I am joking and your friend may not take criticism too well. It doesn't matter if she sings badly - buy some ear plugs and smile enthusiastically everytime she makes cats howl.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2007): I agree with the earlier answer. If your bf really cared for you he'd wait until you were ready for a sexual relationship. His threatening to end the relationship is disrespectful, uncaring and immature. Make sure your first time is with someone who really loves you and cares about you. You are right, 15 is too young for sex. I know kids grow up faster these days but apart from being illegal under 16, most girls are not emotionally ready at that age. When you feel you are ready to take a relationship to that stage, make sure you insist on a condom. if the boy says no to that too, then again, they are not putting your wellbeing first. Good luck!
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A
female
reader, gf123 +, writes (15 May 2007):
 I totally agree with Farris. It would not be wise to tell your friend that she can not sing. I think this would be quite hurtful and is also unnecessary. Try taking her aside (quietly and without everyone else knowing what you are going to do) and tell her how you feel about the amount (rather than the quality!) of her singing. She will be far more understanding if you do this in a non-accusatory and sympathetic way, taking on board anything she may say in return.
As for the sex issue, good on your for standing your ground if you don't feel ready. Please don't rush into a sexual relationship because of pressure from your boyfriend, you will only regret it. As Farris also said, he is only worth your time if he respects your decision.
Best of luck
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A
female
reader, minaah +, writes (15 May 2007):
well about ur friend yooh r going to have to tell her sooner or latrev soo yooh may as well do it sooner ...before she makes a complete fool of herself..
about ur boyfriend i dunoo it is illegal innit buhh every wun does at ur age soo its a top minor innit buhh dnt let him pressure yooh in to it doo it if it right for yooh
good luck bbe.....xxxxxx
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A
female
reader, Farris +, writes (15 May 2007):
 If your boyfriend is worth having then he means it when he says it's okay. If he really wants to be with you then he should wait until the end of the earth for you. If he doesn't and threatens to leave if you won't sleep with him, then he's not really the sort of guy you want to be with, right?
Secondly, the easiest thing to do with your friend is just to tell her straight that her singing all the time is starting to annoy you... You don't have to mention that you don't think she sings well, as she'll just take this as a personal attack and get upset.
Good luck.
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