A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:How can I stop talking to my guy friends? I'm still in high school and my boyfriends in his first year of college. He doesn't talk to girls at all in college because he says he loves me too much to talk to them but I talk to two guy friends and he gets really mad so now I want to know how stop being friends with them. I really love my boyfriend so I'm willing to stop being friends with guys, but how do I stop? He says that if I talk to a guy again he'll have sex with a girl. Please tell me how to stop. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Mark_25_  +, writes (5 September 2011):
 I think you need to stop breaking your back trying to please him and realise that what he's asking you to do is completely selfish and immature.
It sounds like your boyfriend is under the impression that you can't be friends with someone of the opposite sex which is completely rediculous. My two best friends are both female and if a girlfriend did what your boyfriends doing to you, she would be out of my life.
It sounds like the whole "blinded by love" syndrome, your making it more reasonable in your head because your in love with him. You need to try seeing it as everyone else can - imagine your best friend in the same situation, you would tell her that she can't stand for that sort of behaviour.
Lastly, he's threatening to have sex with another girl??? The moment you said that you should have got rid of him because even threatening to do it is completely unforgivable - the fact he's done that shows that he would do it, and you can't trust him if he's prepared to cheat. I'm sorry to have to say this but you really shouldn't be with someone like that, he's letting jealousy plague everything. As "Yos" pointed out, he doesn't love you if he's willing to cheat on you. You really need to take the advice everyone has given here as it's all very good advice. It's not what you want to hear, but unfortunately it's the correct thing to do.
A
male
reader, serenity80 +, writes (5 September 2011):
This is a very worrying situation. Your boyfriend is extremely jealous and this kind of behaviour can only lead to worse. You need to discuss this issue with friends and family.
Unless your boyfriend is able to change his behaviour and see what he is doing as very wrong, you will never be able to have a loving and stable relationship with him.
The more you do what he says, the worst it will get. First it is your friends, the next it will be your family. He'll control what you wear, do, say and even if you do all this, it will still not be enough.
He has already threatened to cheat on you, this ALONE should be enough for you to take a step back and see that his relationship is not good. You are at a high risk of getting yourself in to something that is going to seriously hurt you. Please read the advise you have got on here very carefully and don't ignore it.
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A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (5 September 2011):
 This is very messed up and wrong. The demands and behaviour of your boyfriend are right out of line.
You both should have male and female friends. That is normal.
His demanding you have no male friends is not healthy or reasonable.
But the last thing is the most shocking: that he's threatening to have sex with others if you don't do what he want's. That's not love i'm afraid: he's not really in love with you if he's saying that. If he was truly in love he wouldn't sleep with anyone else.
Sorry to say this, but you should consider ending the relationship. Probably the very last thing you want to do :(
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A
female
reader, Blod +, writes (5 September 2011):
 This is wrong! Firstly, why should you stop talking to people you're friends with because of him? If he demands this then he must be pretty insecure, doesn't trust you and sounds slightly controlling/possessive. You have a right to have your own friends, whether they're male or female, and it's important that you give them as much time as you do your boyfriend. Your friends are the people that will always be there for you and support you if anything happens with your boyfriend. And that includes your male friends.
The most worrying part is that your boyfriend says he'll sleep with another girl if you stay friends with them. That's ridiculous! This is blackmail. Also, how can he go from never talking to girls to sleeping with one? He makes it sound as if he can have whatever he wants when he wants it. You really need to be aware.
You're asking us how to end friendships because your boyfriend's blackmailing you. That's a pretty sure sign that you're under his control. You may love him, but you need to realize that he's taking advantage of that. What would you think if one of your guy friends stopped talking to you because their girlfriend's blackmailing them?
I'm sorry to be blunt but you really need to take a step back from this situation and see how ridiculous all of this is. Good luck.
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