| A
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: i've fallen for a male friend who i have know for many years..i don't want to ruin our friendship as we are quite close. how can i stop myself from loving him?? i have done so for 2 years and it hurts me...because i see him going out with other girls and wish i could be them (pathetic i know)....although i know he doesnt love me back i feel i cant stop this feeling...HELP!! Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, PsyCookie  +, writes (6 September 2008):
 You gotta re-direct your love in some other way.
Focus the love you have for him as a form of friendship. Try to be happy when you see him happy with another girl. At least you will have the peace at your heart that she's no mistreating him and making him miserable. Focus on your friendship. Value it and see it that although you two aren't lovers, at least you two are great friends and that's better than nothing.
Then, try to focus your interest in someone else, even if it's shallow, at first. Don't do this to make him jealous! because he will not get jealous and likely be happy for you. Also, try to not compare any guy with him because you will get stuck in a rut. If you start doing this, try to focus on the new guy's good qualities.
I've been there too, so I know what you're feeling. I thought one of my best friends, the one I liked, wasn't interested in me because he went he got girlfriends and looked happy with them. I did the above to get over him. Well, I did, and if I hadn't, I would have not met the love of my life. You know, it's funny because it turned out he liked me but couldn't see anything with me, but you know, I'm not sorry that we never did anything. It was meant to be that we were only going to be friends and nothing more because I found the person right for me and he wasn't. Maybe it's the same with you.
|
