A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Okay, my boyfriend and I have been dating for about 10 months. I am in the 10th and he is in the 11th, (but I'm graduating early)... Well he doesn't like when other guys talk to me. At all. I can't sit with guys or talk to them and he does the same about girls. Except I didn't make it a rule except his ex who he had sex with. He is my first and we have been arguing a lot lately. I don't know what to do to fix this. I've tried talking to him. Idk what to do. Help me please!
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female
reader, Hours  +, writes (17 September 2010):
 Hi,
I don't think you can stop him from being possessive.
Some people are just that way. First you can try talking to him about how you feel and say you would hate to break up because of that. If after that things don't go any better, you should break up while you still haven't attached to him too much.
Sincerely, Hours
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (16 September 2010):
End it, ASAP. Because if you allow this, shortly he will be picking your clothes, then shouting at you, then making you give up school, then hitting you. That's how these relationships go.
You have a dangerously jealous and insecure boyfriend who will cause you a serious amount of pain.
Clear of out of your life, or your life will be blighted by people like him.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (16 September 2010):
 So basically you're to be cut off from the opposite sex and so is he? What a controlling, insecure, jealous boyfriend you have. You can't control who talks to you, even if a guy that is sitting in front of you in class turns around and asks you if he can borrow a pencil. What do you mean you didn't make it a rule who he has sex with? Explain.
So there's no talking to him. Typical. You really only have 2 options left and you're not going to like either of them
1. Give him an ultimatum, tell him that his possessiveness is causing too many fights, and he needs to stop or you will break up with him.
2. Break up with him.
Really, you can't make him change his ways. This is how he is. And he can't make you do anything, you're letting him control you. You don't have to put up with this crap, break up with him and find a boy who won't try to control you.
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A
female
reader, ailemaaax  +, writes (16 September 2010):
I had this problem with a boyfriend when I was 16. I had a very close male friend (who was gay but nobody but me knew) and my boyfriend at the time forbid me from talking to him, or he would threaten to dump me. I eventually chose my friend over my boyfriend, and he still remains one of my best friends today.
I think it's a maturity thing with boys that age (or LACK OF), although some are just naturally possessive. You should try talking to him, but if you can't get through to him, you should consider whether someone controlling like that is really who you want in your life.
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