A
female
age
26-29,
*julia*
writes:Hi veeryone. I'm 13 and want to know why I am so angry. I haven't had a good life at all and my mom said she fears I will run away or something. But the littlest things get me angry and it is very sudden. I don't want to Hurt myself, but I want to say some pretty bad stuff to people who make mad. Peoples emotions also rub off on me. If my mom is mad or stressed, I get filled with so much anger and hate. I don't know what's wrong with me but I don't want special help. I want to know how to fix this by myself. Please help me. :( Reply to this Question
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (3 October 2010):
No wonder you're angry and upset! You have every right to be. There's a lot going on right now, right at the age when you're about to start growing up and developing into an adult. So you have my sympathy.
You're obviously a smart girl. You're only 13, and you'be been through a lot. Yet you're smart enough to realize that your emotions are now causing you trouble, and you'd like to deal with them. That's good, mature thinking.
I think a lot of your anger probably stems from your parents divorce. Yes, your hormones at your age will be driving you mad, but it has to be said that hormones are manageable if you have support and understanding around you.
The first person you need to talk to is your mum. She us clearly very worried about you, and it's causing you both a huge amount of stress. She really wants to be there for you. So let he be there. Sit down with her and tell her exactly what you've said here. Tell her you're angry and upset right now because of the divorce and school. And don't get angry whilst talking to her or anything. Do it nice and calmly so you can both understand each other. Tell her that the divorce has made you feel this way. Tell her you feel angry towards people at school. Tell her you're sad about your Dog. Tell her everything, and trust her to do the right thing. Have a good, honest talk with your mum. Start there and see what happens. You'd be surprised at the effect an honest talk with a reassuring, caring parent can have on you.
A
female
reader, *julia* +, writes (3 October 2010):
*julia* is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSome one said to tell you all about me so I will. My parents went through a really bad divorce, I have to move out of my house, and I my dog has cancer. My mom is so dressed out and i feel the same with school. I have just had a hard life and I'm only 13.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (1 October 2010):
Tell us about your life. Why haven't you had a good life?
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A
male
reader, N3m0  +, writes (1 October 2010):
Lol you sound like me. but im like that at age 19.alot of things bother me, like stupid people doing stupid things. What i try to do is just get away from all that. usually when i get mad i get loud, so the best thig for me if i just leave and go alone somewhere so i can just think about other things. .. i would say almost think selfishly and have your own time to do things that you want, that way you cant get mad at yourself. youll get out of it sooner or later, also be careful it could lead to deppression or worst, so do your best to be good and take alot of time for yourself and rethink why you get mad and try to see patterns in the things you hate, so you can avoid them easier.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (1 October 2010):
 You are only 13, your hormones are raging about aimlessly trying to sort themselves out. You are going to feel a variety of new emotions, see things in a new light. It is all a part of growing up and though it can be an intense period of your life, you can control it. Practice control.
I hope that helps.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2010): Iv battled with anger for a long time...so much so that I felt that it was consuming me. One moment I would be fine, the next moment I wud be trembling with anger. I had a few terrible relationships, and i had started to become very bitter. I have a wonderful boyfriend now, but i was constantly fuming at him as well. I was abusive, obnoxious... a demon when i was angry.
Until I started questioning myself. Whats the point in getting angry?? Does it solve anything? Does it make the situation better? Does it make ME feel better? Do i "win" an argument? Do i scare the other person into agreeing with me??
I realized that the answers were pretty much all in the negative. Keep telling yourself, ANGER NEVER SOLVES ANYTHING. If anything, it just makes it worse. If you say bad stuff to people when you feel bad, do you know whats going to happen? It will all backfire on YOU honey. Even if those people are bad and they'v done mean things, if you say bad things to them, then you become the bad guy and they get a chance to point a finger at you and say..."how dare to talk to me like that...how could you say such a thing!!!" So you see what happens? Their meanness gets diluted, and your anger gets highlighted, even though you haven't done anything!!
When you're angry, just dont talk. Remove yourself from the situation which triggers your anger. If you dont like what a person is saying, politely just walk away. If you dont like what a friend is saying, just say..."look...his is driving me crazy...il talk to you later...i dont want to say anything now". Sometimes it takes an hour to cool down, sometimes it'l take a day...but you will eventually see how much easier it is to not get angry!! Trust me, your anger will simmer down, and you'll end up feeling so much better.
Hope this helps!
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A
female
reader, RishaAyne +, writes (1 October 2010):
i know what you mean...im 13 and my life isnt all that great and i get mad very easly... and my mom just drives me crazyer... what i do is when im at home i try really hard to just stay in my room and text or talk to people that make you happy or listen to music... and try to hang out with people that make you happy too at school... do u have realy wierd emotion changes or are u mad all the time? cu if ur emotions change u might have bi-poler disoreder....
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