A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ok my boyfriend of two months made out with another girl a week before he asked me out, she's pretty,skinny and i'm well not like her lets say. i have a very low ego but put on confidence. i am going to a party where she is going to be and she is pretty slutty and tries to throw herself at him. he regrets making out with her. so question is how can i stop being so paranoid about her?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2009): You say that the other girl acts "slutty", well, think about why she does this. She probably has no real self-esteem either or else she wouldn't feel the need to behave that way. Take heart! Real confidence and self-esteem don't come from acting like an attention whore or from trying to get others to feed your ego, but from within- just try to remember that no one is any better than you, not even your new boyfriend, and be sure to act confident even when you don't yet feel that way inside, and soon you will.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (29 December 2009):
Your esteem is the problem, not him. He could have gone with her, but he chose you instead. You have to build up your confidence. Ask yourself why you're underconfident. Have you been hurt before? Or bullied? The problem isn't her or him, it's your esteem at the moment.
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