A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Can anyone out there with a recent Sony Ericcson cellphone instruct me how to open the text message box and go to the in box to read the texts. I tried to do it today but couldnt quite work out the keys. My boyfriend recently changed his phone and I caught him out lying to me that it was his alarm going off when I had already picked it up thinking it was a call and saw that he had a message waiting to be read. When I asked who it was from he he said it was his alarm but I told him I knew it was a text message. He then said it was from an old girlfriend sending him her new number but it meant nothing but I caught him about a month ago sending a very suggestive text to this same person. I know it is wrong of me to think of reading his phone but it is making me feel so bad that he may be cheating on me and I want to contact this woman to see what her relationship is with him before I decide what to do about him. We have been together more than two years.
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female
reader, penta  +, writes (27 August 2007):
 You don't. You either trust him or you don't.
Tell him that you'd like him, this once, to show you his inbox. Tell him that because of the past times you're really insecure. Let him know that after this time you'll let it go as long as the messages aren't there. Ask him if you and he can talk to this other woman together over coffee or something. (If she's 'just a friend' he should be comfortable sharing the friendship with you.)
If they're clear, you need to work on trusting him. If it's not clear or if he won't show you, you probably should leave him. Living like this will drive you slowly insane and you deserve better.
A
male
reader, duce00 +, writes (27 August 2007):
 I have been in a similar situation but it was with her computer. Heres my perspective on it. If the issue is real and not just your own fears getting the best of you then its a real problem. Keeping occasional contact with an ex is not horrible as long as respecting your current partner is your top priority. This means even when nobody is watching. If you dont have this with your man then there are some real trust and loyalty issues in your relationship. Figuring out his phone to peek at his messages shouldnt even be nescessary. If you see the signs and your guts are telling you its wrong then forget about his phone and take the situation on face to face.
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