A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I broke up after a ten month relationship. He doesn't live in my hometown anymore, so that makes it a little easier.I am trying hard to concentrate on my school work this year, because I am repeating my freshman year again. But in class I take a walk down memory lane.. all the times we said I love you, and all the special little moments we had and all of a sudden the class is over and my page is blank.I feel this aching feeling all the time, and how I just miss him so much and even if I could see him for a moment, or even if I could go back and relive one kiss.. then I'd be okay, but until then.. I don't feel like I'm ever going to be okay and I don't know how to put myself first, cause I haven't been for a long time.
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female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (18 September 2009):
 How to put yourself first... good question.
First, I'll say that a lot of people have been there. Most everybody. I know I have. The feeling of not knowing if you'll ever get over it and the mind bogged down with memories that you can't seem to shake. So you're with good company.
But, how to put yourself first. First, don't expect to forget him instantly. It won't happen. And if you expect it to happen, or try to make it happen, it'll come back and hit you even harder. What you need to do is start writing in a journal (to get it out of your head and onto some paper) and distracting yourself constantly. Try to do things for you like reconnecting with friends, going to the gym, trying something new (tap dance? theater? yoga?), going to the movies, inviting your girls over for an old school sleepover (completely with junk food, nail polish & chick flicks. Seriously, even at 23, it is such amazing therapy!).
You just have to get out there. Push yourself out there. And if you have down time, think, "what can I be doing right now?" and do it! Even if that means getting your Mom to play Go Fish with you, it's something.
The more days go by, and the more time you fill, the easier it will become. I sympathize, sweetness, breaking up is hard to do. Let's face it - it sucks. But, there is light at the end of the tunnel and you'll get there soon enough.
Good luck, sweetness!!
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