A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I really like this guy at church but I've never had the confidence to chat to him before, but recently at a friends suprise birthday party he started talking to me. We spoke for a long time and he was making a lot of eye contact with me but i was so nervous that i could never hold eye contact. His body language was really positive, i don't know if that's just because he was comfortable with where he was or that he was comfortable talking to me. Also when we were talking we both tended to lean in towards each other. It didn't help me at all that both his parents were there and so was my mum. I want a chance to talk to him again but I just can't seem to pluck up the courage and he hasn't gone out of his way to speak to me since then either. My mum keeps saying he's probably shy but that could just be my mum trying to spare my feelings. It's a difficult situation because he's a sunday school teacher and I might be working with him soon, if I was to tell him it would make things awkward and as we go to the same church I don't really want that, He's also a bit older than me so maybe he thinks i'm not intrested because of my age. I'd just like some advice my friends are all a bit immature so i can't really talk to them about this and as for my mum as lovely as she is she does tell me what i want to hear a lot of the time. Thanks to anyone who answers this any advice is better than none.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, boo22 +, writes (3 December 2009):
 hi, ask him if he wants to go for a coffee after church . stop thinking and start doing.
good luck x
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (3 December 2009):
It sounds like he likes you, especially if he's mimicking you body language. But there's only one way to find out, and that's to ask him. If you don't, you'll never know. Look him in the eye and tell him you fancy him and would like to take your relationship further. Be brave!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHello,
So many problems haha, same guy. Still not sure if he likes me, we talk a lot more than we used to and he's given me a lift home in his car. i'm still shy around him and i really want to know if he likes me. certain things make me think that he might like we were at a party the other day and he was talking to someone else and i put a stupid hat on and he noticed and started laughing at me. we seem to mimic eachothers body language as well. we talk non stop for ages but i just wan't to know does he like me or not. it's gotten to the point where i'm not sure if he's shy or if he likes me.
oh i've also asked him for help and he did help me with something, we've borrowed each others films as well. I just don't know what to do i need help.
thanks to all who answered me.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (23 September 2009):
If you're going to be working with him, that gives you a great excuse to talk to him without having to open yourself up too much. Men need to be needed, so ask his help about something. Then go from there and see what happens. Oh, and smile and nod and flutter those eyelids too! You don't have to talk and if he's clever, he might get the idea. x
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A
female
reader, Lola1  +, writes (23 September 2009):
 There are two reasons why you are feeling so nervous about talking to him.
1)You like him quite a lot.
2)You feel there is a lot at stake if it doesn’t go well.
Both of these factors have built the idea of speaking to him again up in your mind… making the idea grow in intensity. I suggest you break it down into small “bite-sized” pieces.
Start by smiling at him when you make eye contact during the course of a day. Make yourself available by staying a little behind once in a while, by yourself for a few minutes at a time and see if he comes to talk to you on his own. Don’t think too much about the conversation, or initiating one. Instead take each day one at a time and when you do talk to him, it will be more natural.
Keep in mind that it’s possible that because he is older, he may not be looking at you as a potential girlfriend, but this may change as he gets to know you while working together in the future.
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, boo22 +, writes (23 September 2009):
Hiya, Do you know what this guys situation is ? He may be with someone and thats the reason he's not coming forward.
I know it can awkward when you like someone and your brain goes and thats natural, so don't worry.
My advice is, if you are going to be working with him at some point, ask him for some help or advice about something he knows about. Guys like to be helpful and after that you can chat about other things and take it from there.
You just need to get the ball rolling and then you can see what happens. good luck
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