A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, me and my new girlfriend (since last night) just had our first sexual encounter last night. We played with each other, no actual sex. I've noticed that she's extremely tight. As in, one finger only, two hurts.I asked her if this is normal for her, and she says so, she can't fit most toys.I asked her if she wanted to try fitting it, but she said not yet. (which I'm completely fine with) I'd just like to know what I can do to make it more comfortable for her. I realise she's probably afraid and nervous about it. (she's a virgin)I've never felt a girl be this tight though, really felt rock solid.Should I try to relax her and slowly try more fingers until she's ready, or is pushing through the first time the solution? (Obviously this is all assuming she gives me permission to do such a thing, I wouldn't just push through if she says it's too much. We communicate very well.)Or is there something that will help her relax those muscles more?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 April 2013): Fingers hurt more than a penis, I'll say that first. When I was a virgin I couldn't put more than one finger in but a penia went in easily. So when you eventually get down to it, put the tip there and go in an out with the tip, well lubed. Playing with her clitoris, and then go a cm more each time, if its painful, well try again next time but this should work.
A
male
reader, CMMP  +, writes (31 March 2013):
Look, it's very unlikely that she's that tight. Even if it's been her personal experience (alone) she is still probably making herself tight. Although it's possible to loosen a vagina (age, pregnancy or manual stretching) its not something that you ever should have to do in order to have sex.
As she becomes more comfortable with the idea of things being inside her she will naturally loosen up enough to have somewhat uncomfortable sex. As time goes on she'll loosen up somewhat more because her vagina will be more relaxed. It'll just take time, there's no two ways about it. But stretching isn't advised, only patience.
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A
female
reader, st4rfish +, writes (31 March 2013):
 I think sex can be discussed later in your relationship. Even though you've known one another for months, becoming official opens a whole new door of emotions for her. She needs plenty of time to become comfortable. Sex is only enjoyable if both parties are relaxed. Her muscles are tense because she's nervous. So take it slowly, go on romantic dates, and get to know one another. She'll become more and more comfortable, and it'll happen when she's completely comfortable.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI think most of you misunderstood. We're both very much in love and we go out a lot, go for dinner etc. We're just really open about sexualty and discuss our issues. She's really tight from herself, not nerves. She wants to do it, but wants to know how to losen up.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI've known her for a few months, I asked her to be my girlfriend last night - to explain the first line.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2013): are you saying this "girlfriend" is someone you have know since the night before you posted you question? Thats not a girlfriend - that's a vague aqaintance!!! If this girl is going to lose her virginity to you then take it slow. Her tightness is nervousness and a sign you need to make her more comfortable. Apart from the first line of your OP you sound a caring, decent boyfriend BUT if your post reads correctly and you've know her 24 hours the SLOW DOWN! Do you want her to regret it? If I am mistaken then I apologise.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (29 March 2013):
 Did you say she's only been her girlfriend since last night? Does that mean you've only known her for a day?
Best to slow down and not think about sex for a couple of months if that's the case because you both are strangers to each other.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionShe said it's normal for her, even when she's alone. And I made sure she was excited before trying anything with my fingers. I got some lube on my fingers as well.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (29 March 2013):
It's not her tightness your feeling, it's her being nervous. She needs to be more relaxed and comfortable. Also you may want to use some lube.
That being said go slow and as she gets turned on it'll be easier.
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