A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok well there is this girl who lives near me and we are great friends (theres a little crew of us). I have know her for a while and we are great friends, huging and all that stuff. Being truthful shes not particularly pretty, she has a bad temper and a extremly bad reputation, and any guy that has been out with her has got a reputation too. I have heard from a few people that she fancied me, but I didnt take it in as shes such a good friend and I am not attracted to her. I always talk to her about my relationships. Anyway a few nights ago she went to a party, and came back extremly drunk. She then proceeded to tell me how horrible i was for never asking her out or kissing her. She repetly called me up, told me i was the most evil person on earth, tetxted me with insults, i could hear her crying down the phone and repetely asking me why is wouldnt work. She threatened to commit suicide. And when she asked why, one of my reasons was because I would get a bad reputation. I called my ex girlfriend who im friends with (who I still like.. the other girl told me to dump her. It wasnt working at all but the feelings still there and I regret it). Anyway she told me that she had liked me for ages. Next day she called me apologising and so i accepted, after all was drunk. Then, she saves her msn convos (!!), she was reading them and saw I said i would get a bad reputation and now hates me. Even after what she has done, I just dont get it. My girl friends have explained what shes feeling, and woah girls are complicated! I have seriously considered going out with her but there would be no love. I just cant, shes a mother figure to me. Staying clear of this girl is impossible, I see her almost everyday and we catch the same bus and walk home together. I like her as a friend and am ready to forgive her but it seems she wont talk to me about what shes feelings. This seems like more that a crush, its lasted so long, but I dont love her, and I cant get around that. Please help.
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male
reader, rcn +, writes (23 October 2007):
 "you and I are such good friends, I wouldn't want that to change."
"you're such a great friend, dating would be like dating my sister."
"I just couldn't see you in another way other than being a friend because I treasure the friendship we share."
"I'm still not over my last relationship, it's going to take me a long long time to heal before I'm ready to date again."
I hope this works for you. Just remember if you like her as a friend, don't tell her about her reputation. She'll start wondering why you're her friend if she doesn't have a good reputation.
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