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writes: I'm a 25 years old male, one of my problems is that i do not talk to people alot and i want to know how can i improve my communication?, i hardly talk to to people i don't know why. i've always been very quiet and that is who im. sometimes i like the way i'm and sometimes i just dont. I hardly even talk to some of my close friends. im just very quiet. i prefer to be alone most of the time. i like it quiet and peaceful. i do not like loud music or loud noises. i've always been very sensitive. sometimes i feel like i lack something but im not sure what it is. is it confidence? i feel like that someties. I call my self solitary sometimes because of the way im. is there a way that i can improve my communication?. sometimes i;m pretty shy too. i don't know why..
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2010): Hey pal!
Being introverted is okay. However, it can be unhealthy as from a sociology perspective humans do indeed need human interaction to survive as that is necessary for us to psychologically develop. Ever seen the film cast away with tom hanks? His little beachball is a symbol for a human being.
Im a little shy myself, honestly. I overcome that simply by realizing if I dont talk to people, how can I learn anything? If I didnt go out with my friends, how could I ever have learned alcohol is def not my thing?..or if I didnt go to the club I wouldnt have known trance music is my solace.
When you take iniative to discover things about yourself you develop confidence because you gain more interests and with more interests it is easier for you to find more common ground with people. Make sense? Good luck on this bud.
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reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (2 November 2010):
Hi there. It depends on what you want to do.
Does it make you unhappy, or is it not very important to you?
Most people like their solitude at different times, and it's perfectly healthy to like your own company. Nothing wrong with it at all. It's very peaceful.
Being by yourself can be very therapeutic, being alone with your own thoughts about life.
There's no real requirement to always be with people and talking to people. It's a very individual thing.
Only when you are in a work environment, do you have occasion at times, to need to talk to someone regarding part of your job duties. It doesn't have to be much talk though, just what is relevant to ask.
Otherwise, it's only if you are out in a social environment do you find yourself standing in a group of people and feel the need to talk. But even then it's a very personal thing.
You can still be by yourself or move away from a crowd to be by yourself. You can even decline an invitation to be in that environment in the first place, especially as it's not what you enjoy.
I guess also, it depends on what your intentions in life are. You haven't mentioned it, but are you thinking along the lines of finding a life partner? Someone to share your life with, in future?
If this is the case, perhaps you could start a hobby that interests you, then you will meet like minded people who you will have something in common with, and can then discuss your hobby together.
This will be a natural consequence of doing that hobby. Conversation will just begin to flow, one subject will flow onto another, and another. Before you know it, you are talking about anything and everything - with the greatest of ease. No worries at all.
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