A
male
age
36-40,
*oe24
writes:I have been in a relationship with a guy for the last 4 1/2 years, we have been through a lot and have always been there for each other.Our relationship was great from the start and we have a lot of history together, which made the feeling of finally getting together even better. Our relationship has had tough times, then who’s hasn't but I think we have been through a lot more than most other couples would ever experience, let me explain. We are both in our early 20's and have both lost out mums, mine only a year ago and my partners almost 2. This has really brought us closer together and he has always been there when I need a shoulder to cry on and someone to comfort me and I do the same for him. My mum was my best friend and we were really close, she was only young when she died (not even 50) and it was a very low point in my life and I did not cope very well, I was signed off work, I would not leave my house, and I decided I need to move out of my house and away from the town I grew up in. So I moved to the other end of the country, set up home again and I started a new job, which is ok, but the people I work with are really great and I have made some really brilliant friends, but the thing is I have started talking to a girl at work, and I’m not sure how it happened but we have started to flirt quite heavily and she makes me feel really good about myself, nothing has happened, but I don’t remember the last time I felt this good. I am really confused with the whole situation. I have feelings which I have not felt in a very long time and I’m really struggling to make any sense of the situation. Am I staying in a relationship for all the right reasons and how can I feel things towards another person when I think I’m in love with my current partner. Its not a simple situation is it….???
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Libra1963  +, writes (24 July 2009):
 We are always attractd to the sweet jar. You know you shouldn't but you do. It sounds like your relationship has survived a great deal.. Why ruin it for a relationship that may not even last. Be friends with this person but it has taken many years to build your relationship. Do you really want to throw all that away?
May be your relationship is a little stagnant at the moment. Have a week end away - do something spontaneous. enjoy each other. It may bring back life into your relationship and you will see what you feel in love with in the first place.
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