A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I last had sex about 6 months ago, i've only ever had it 3 times (to the same guy) but each time it really hurt... the pain was excruciating so we always had to stop, which was disappointing for us both! Me and this guy broke up a while ago, and I have now found myself interested in an older man, I'd really like to get involved with him but i'm scared that if we ever have sex that it will be painful again? I would be really embarrassed if we had to stop.I know first times are meant to hurt but I thought the second and third time would be more pleasurable! But I did have some issues with my ex; I didn't find him very attractive therefore, wasn't very turned on by him, secondly, he was quite 'big'. I don't know if either of these things may have contributed to the pain. But I desperately want the next time to be more pleasurable, i'm really dreading it. Any suggestions?
View related questions:
broke up, my ex, older man Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2010): My first 5 or 6 times hurt a lot and I had to ask him to stop. Then I went 3 years without trying it again because I was scared of it hurting again. Then the first time with that guy there was a bit of blood but it didn't hurt nearly as much and kept getting better, hurting less. So I guess it can take quite a few times for some people to stop feeling any pain. And not being that attracted to him and him being so big would have made a huge difference to what you felt. For me, my 3rd sexual partner was older than me and with his greater experience, helped me discover so much about sex, it was incredible. I'm not saying that'll definitely happen with your older guy, but I think he'd probably be more likely to be patient and understanding of your enjoyment and it could be great for you :) Don't be nervous!
A
female
reader, rose the relationship solver +, writes (20 January 2010):
 it culd be the size and it could be because u might be a bit tight some girls r some arnt but either way sum of the time it will be uncomfortable...try diffrent positions and ask him to go slow and steady c wat happens
...............................
A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (20 January 2010):
 Go out and get some lube. Something regular should help out alot. Also try fingering yourself on the days leading up to you two getting together. Also make sure that there is lots of foreplay before he enters you so that you can be fully aroused and self lubricated.
...............................
|
