A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hiya,I'll understand when you read this is you just tell me to grow up and get over it but i really need some help. Around November my dog that i'd had since i was 6 got quite ill and we didn't know what was wrong with her and in December she went to an animal hospital where she was cured as they found out what was wrong with her. Its just that all happened around Christmas last year and in the January she got worse and we had to have her put down. And now its Christmas again, stating the obvious i know. But still its really hard. She wasn't just a dog to me she was everything she didn't just act lke a dog se acted as if she was one of us and even tried joining in on things like games as strange as it may sound. We did alot together and i had decided to do alot more with her this sumer thats just gone since i never really took her out anywhee but she had died before we could do anything. I'm finding it really hard this christmas because of her. I took it badly when she was ill and died and have never truely got over her. A lot of people my age don't understand because she was only a dog . When i'm in the house on my own it worse because she was there. I was never one to go out alot and liked to stay on my own. I just can't seem to get over it and it being christmas has made it a million times worse. What can i do to be happy again i don't want to let this get me down ten i can't snap out of it. I want a good christmas without feeling guilty about having a good time when shes not there, and thats not just with her but my grandad too its my second year without him. It just makes me feel guilty and makes me miss them more but i suppose its my dog thats making me like this the most. I really need help.
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female
reader, keely-h +, writes (23 December 2007):
 the same thing happend to me with my cat in july i cryed for a few days then got better it was so sad i had him since i was in year two and he died to wekks before the summer holidays.i am in year 10 now and i have a kitten i do love him but no where as near as how much i loved my old cat he was so perfect i couldnt describe keep busy helps too.and when i got back to school it helped.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 December 2007): I'm an extreme dog lover like you and I'm in my thirties. When I was 24 I lost my loving chihuahua whom, believe it or not, had been with me since I had just turned 5! Yes, he was that old. Imagine my grief!
But I guess I was kind of 'prepared' a little because I did everything for him to be happy. I always prayed to God to let him die of natural causes and for me to be there or not when he was going to die (the one thing that would make me feel better)
It was hard to see him die. I wish I could have put him to sleep like you did with yours but he died sooo slowly and he got worse at midnight so there was nothing to do.
He truly enjoyed life and I made all kinds of efforts for him whenever I could. That was the only way to show him my love and to remind myself I was a good owner now that he is not here.
Nobody knows I still cry for him sometimes. Now you do. It's very rare but I do. Less than a week ago I was crying remembering him. It took me 8 months to get another puppy and I named him after one of the nicknames I used to call my other dog, like to honor him.
I understand your suffering. But you have to understand that she was put on this earth as a gift from God to you. He gave her to you all those years (many or not) so you would take care of her and so she would lead a happy life. And you did your job, and a very good one, at conquering that. Her purpose was to make you happy as well.
With her you grew up and learned to become a good owner. She made you understand God can delight us in many ways. Because God is the one who puts all that love in dogs for us.
You can still honor her life by displaying pictures of her, telling people about the great things she did and how she made you so happy. But more importantly, you can honor her life by taking all those things she taught you and use them to love another puppy.
If she had the ability to come to life as a spirit who could see you right now I'm sure she wouldn't like to see you crying and suffering for her. She wants you to manifest all that love she taught you to a needy puppy. One that it's sure right now needing you to pet him/her. One that's shivering maybe. How can you have all that love and not notice there's another puppy God has assigned to you to love and to care and he or she is waiting right now for you? Go to an animal shelter and I'm sure you'll see your lost doggie in the eyes of a new puppy.
That's how I knew this one was the one for me. It gave me a signal and I knew right away this one was the one God had for the next phase in my life.
This is too my second year without my loving grandmother. The only person in my family that I felt was always very ineterested in my happiness. Even more than my mother. It has been hard. But it's so pretty when you have that memory of your grandparents and you can continue life with what they taught you. One has to be strong to accept life's phases.
This is the phase were you have to find love within yourself and enjoy christmas in it's original purpose which is the birth of our Saviour Jesus. Thank him for giving you the opportunity to know your grandpa. Do you know how many kids grow up without knowing their grandfather? You are blessed because God gave you more than ten years with yours.
He (your grandpa) too would want you to go on with your life. He'd feel sad to know you can't enjoy Christmas in the most important years of your life. You are his descendant, you are his blood. Therefore a piece of him lives in you. Don't kill yourself grieving. Instead live the way he wanted you to live. Live happy. Please, enjoy the most beautiful season of the year. There's no reason to feel guilty.
Blessings and Best Wishes!
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A
male
reader, Andy00 +, writes (23 December 2007):
 I hope you have found since you posted this question how understanding we aunts and uncles are at this site. What you're feeling is normal! That dog was in your life for a good 9/10 years, and when you're used to having something around everyday, it is difficult to get used to it not being there. I had a fish that lived for 14 years, and when it died, it felt strange not having the tank in the living room for some time afterwards.
What you feel is quite understandable. The seasons bring all sorts of memories with them, and this season brings some sad ones to you. But this season I think is a pretty good one for sad memories, because it is a time for being thankful for everything you have in your life just now. Look around at what you have. You lost a dear companion a year ago, but think of all the good memories this time of year will have surely brought you.
Please try not to let this spoil your Christmas. I understand it's easier said than done. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, O Connor  +, writes (22 December 2007):
 i completely understand wat your goin through hun, this only happened a year ago and losing pets can sometimes have a heavier impact on the owner than other bereavements. but dont worry, as time goes on things will get easier for you. just remember that she would have been in pain had she stayed any longer, and she is happy and healthy werever she is now. it may not be much comfort but check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rainbow_Bridge_%28pets%29 - its always brought a smile to my face!
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A
female
reader, Fairy_Lu +, writes (22 December 2007):
 Im so sorry for your loss i know some people have no idea what your going through but animals are part of the family i cant tell you when it will get easier but i promise you it does with time, there is nothing you can really do to make you feel better but crying helps let it out just let the tears flow its a good release and it helps she will always be with you she lives on in your heart and in your memories she knows that you loved her and she is at peace now she is on that rainbow where all the animals go when they pass from this life watching over you and it will get easier and your heartache and grief will fade.
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (22 December 2007):
 I do understand. The first anniversary without anyone who was important to you is so difficult, even without the added poignancy of them having passed away so close before or after christmas. My grandfather died just before christmas some years ago but I always think of him and remember the first christmas when it was all too fresh and raw to do anything but cry. The thing is though, do you think your dog would want you to feel sad and not enjoy your christmas? I know that maybe dogs don't think like that, or maybe they do, but the truth is that our lives don't go on forever, animals lives go on even less time again and we need to enjoy the time we have. Of course it is sad and awful when someone is taken away from us but we can't let it take us over. A bit of advice someone gave me the christmas my grandfather died... you may not feel like celebrating but sometimes you have to practise being happy or you forget how to be. Keep that in mind.
CD
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