A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ok so my mom wont let me date till 18 and then i sneak off and get a boyfriend and she finds out after i tell her when she asked and she is fine with it until she finds out about his dad.. does drugs and stuff yeah well i dont think the dad has anything to do withthis. i really love my bf and we want our realtionship to go on and on we havent did anything bad just kissed and held hands i want my mom to trust me with him even if his dad is she wont give me a chance HELP PLEASE!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2007): alright im the same here stuck on this like the thing is wat if she told u to break up with him & that hasnt happened yet?
A
female
reader, baybee-x-sparkii  +, writes (9 October 2007):
 work hard for a second chace... dont do anything rele bad with ur relationship [i.e go further than you should] until your legal, at least then your mum can tell you are responsible. it silly little things like being home on time, calling when your going to be late, all these things help a mum to trust her daughter.
try bringing the boy around so that the mother gets to know and trust him, and even to the point where she feels safe in the fact that his dad hasnt had an influence on him...
if you want anymore help drop me an email x good luck x
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A
female
reader, penta +, writes (9 October 2007):
 Okay, two strikes: sneaking off and the bad example his dad sets for him. You're going to have to work really hard.
The first thing you do is you're not alone with him until you're either older, or your mom fully trusts you. This will be hard. But once she sees that you're not going to sneak off again, it will be a huge help.
The second thing is that you bring him around, A LOT, so that your mom can get to know him. Right now even if she trusts you she doesn't trust him. If the two of them get to know each other, she can learn to trust him.
The final thing is that your boyfriend has to be in on this. He has to be willing to do the first two things absolutely. He shouldn't seek to get you alone, and he has to come often and be polite to your mom. This is a long-term campaign to change her mind, which you can't do overnight. If your boyfriend isn't willing, this won't work.
Your mom really does have your best interests at heart. She's concerned, and you have to understand that. Being up front with her is your best bet. Do everything you can to keep her from worrying and you'll be able to do a lot more.
I always found that you get away with more in the front row of class, being a good student, than you ever do hiding in the back acting out. The teacher knows he can trust the "good" student, so they can do what they want, but keeps an eagle eye on the back row. Be good for your mom and things will work out.
Good luck.
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