A
female
age
41-50,
*lyna
writes:i never had a special boyfriend although i have been approached by a few guys. But, recently i met a guy on line, we first got to know each other from a epal club, after one month than we started chatting. Little did i expect that our relationship will grow into love. He likes me very much, he has been honest with me including he has told me about the girls he slept with and all the things he did in his life, and he does everything that i ask him to do. The problem is1. he always says he likes me, he cares for me, i mean so much to him, but he has yet to say " I Love You " so how will i ever know if he really loves me?2. there's a lot of limitations between us like distance and religion, but in my entire life i have never loved a guy like how i love him.what's the opinion on my problem, and how will i make this relationship successful.. all comments and advised are welcomed, thanks
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female
reader, YummyMummy  +, writes (20 July 2007):
 Why not ask him why he sets himself limitations in your relationship. If he's still getting over being hurt in the past and is holding himself back then he should either not be in a relationship or should be trying to get over the past. A relationship should all be about taking a chance.
Yes there are chances that you'll hurt him or he'll hurt you or blah blah blah but that's part of being in a relationship.
I would try talking to him again because the whole limitations thing sounds dodgy to me.
xxxxxx
A
female
reader, elyna +, writes (19 July 2007):
elyna is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhi thanks a lot for yr replys..i just gave him hint on my feelings,,,and when i asked him about hez feelings,,he said " there is no word to express hez feelings to me,,he is controling all hez feelings cauze he thinks there's a lot of limitations between us,,,he keeps on using the word limitation" according to him,,he is controling hez feeling a lot,,cauze he does not know what to do...he actually asked me what i have in mind...
i expect a guy to be more brave and straightforward in thiz matter,,not hide his feelings,,,we could not discuss much as he is rushing for a seminar outstation,,i will only catup with him next week...
he loves/likes me a lot,,,from whatever he has done for me,,but i don't understand why he is always holding to limitations,,,why is he so scared? and why can't he be brave enough to bring this relationship further?
Hope,,anyone can sugges me how to explain or i don't know,,tell me maybe what's in his mind? or hw can i maybe bring this relationship further..cauze, he is a nice person and i want him...help,,and thanks
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A
male
reader, male260468 +, writes (17 July 2007):
Hi. Yes I agree with the posts. It takes time to get to know someone, not just on the internet. You have to actually also talk to them on the phone, on the internet and get to know them that way. You have to get to know them over time. I would say at least Six to Nine months corresponding. I have got to know my Ghanian girlfriend for nine months, but I am still keeping things slow.
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A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (16 July 2007):
 Be caareful..You love a person you don't really know. That cold be dangerous. Love develops after being together for some time, not over a computer. Take your time.
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A
female
reader, YummyMummy +, writes (16 July 2007):
He will tell you he loves you in his own time. There isn't a set amount of time that someone has to "love" someone else by. The fact he shares how he cares, and how much you mean to him means that he does like you alot.
I am in a long distance relationship and sometimes it is hard to know how the other is feeling but if you are unsure ask him. That's about all I can suggest.
xxxxxxxxxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2007): read the way he writes to you if its in a nice manner then think about it but if its things sexual he just wants you for different things if you get what i mean
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