| A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend doesn't trust me because I kept my "past" from him when we first started dating and he thinks this past was slutty, although everyone has told me it wasn't (I used to make out with guys at parties, no strings attached, you get the picture). The thing is I've never cheated on him but he's paranoid I will or that I like every other guy better, or well I don't know what goes on in his mind. A few nights ago we travelled with our band to play a gig in another city. We met another band, and they were all guys. I was talking with the bass player and a girl said she'd take a picture. I was in between the bass player and my boyfriend. I unconsciously leaned over to where this guy was, there was no physical contact or anything. Today my boyfriend saw this picture and treated me horribly, broke up with me because he says I'm an awful girlfriend, that other girlfriends lean towards their boyfriends, but that I probably fancied this guy, blah, blah...That's not true at all, I just leaned over there because I always lean to my right when someone takes a picture and my boyfriend was to my left. I think this is so stupid, and even though it hurts I guess it's over and I can't be with someone whi thinks so awfully of me. How can I cope?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Your friend  +, writes (11 June 2009):
 Just find another guy.
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (8 June 2009):
 Your boyfriend was already a little crazy, and extremely possessive. He sounds REALLY insecure if he was freaked out about NSA making out at parties (and honey, I think we've ALL had that kind of fun. You're by no means slutty!!!), and proceeded to flip and break up with you over you leaning towards someone else. LEANING?
This guy sounds like a real drag and I would be glad to be rid of him. He sounds like a stress case. Be relieved that you've dropped this stress from your life. He may think awfully of you, but I think anyone who hears his reasons will think "whaaa?". It's not like you have an enormous list of one night stands, threesomes and gang bangs and was making out with said bass player in the photo. So don't worry about what others are thinking about you - they're probably judging HIM a lot more than they're judging YOU.
Be happy that you've dropped that guy and waste no more energy on him. He's simply not worth it and you should go out and have a couple of margaritas with your girlfriends to celebrate your freedom!!
Good luck, sweetness!
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A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries  +, writes (8 June 2009):
 to be honest your past is your past right...
i mean it's not like you've done anything to him now or given him that idea that you've done something awful to him whilst together....
he in some ways is probably really paranoid by your past which is quite silly because it was your past.
as i've said it's not like you've indicated to him that anything has happened whilst you were together.
so for him to not trust you isn't a really good start to the relationship..
as for the photo that's a bit too pathetic i mean so what you leaned towards this guy it's a photo not like you guys made out infront of him....
i think you are better off out of this.
although i can't help but wonder that maybe he's hiding something from you.
i mean he kept saying your past was slutty and it made him paranoid then the picture it's a very petty thing to break up with you over.
i mean don't you maybe think in some ways he's done something to you and is trying to hide it from you by making you out to be the bad person....?
just a theory as my friend he and i always hung out best mates we are and his ex g/f accused him of cheating on her with me! when clearly we weren't and i told him it's a bit strange so he cut all contact with me and it turns out she was actually cheating on him,
it's like a reverse psychology thing.
so maybe in some ways he's done something to you but wants to make you out to be the bad person and find anything to pick at in order to end it with you....?
just have a think or something....
Hope this helps anyways. :)
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