A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am a woman in a relationship with a cuckold boyfriend (live together) who wants me to have sex with other men. I don't want to, and he seems to accept that, although he often accuses me of cheating on him anyway. It seems totally contradictory to me and yet he says it's not me having sex with someone else that bothers him, but the fact that I don't tell him about it. He goes through everything in our place to try to catch me in a lie. I have always been honest and faithful to him!How do I cope with his distrust and delusions? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (2 January 2010):
 Well the safe answer is to always report any suicide threat. Even if you think he is just playing. Seriously this man needs help and at least he may get some.
FA
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2010): He is emotionally blackmailing you by threatening to harm himself. Should you take him seriously? Possibly, but it is crazier to stay in a relationship with someone who is doing that to you.
Tell him to get some help, and then leave. Tell one of his family that he needs help and is threatening suicide.
You may end up needing to get a restraining order against this guy so you can have him arrested if he comes back to bother you. Bottom line, you really need to get out of this relationship NOW.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (2 January 2010):
Yes, that's a classic threat of a man who clearly is warped and wants to control you. Seriously, leave him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNow how do I deal with his threats of harming himself? Is he just trying to give me a guilt trip? Should I take him seriously? What do I do now?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI want to thank you all for your responses.
Since last night there have been additional issues that have come up.
You have given me the strength to know that I can stay strong.
He has now turned the problem inward and is taking full responsibility but is threatening to harm himself if I leave him. I am insisting that he seek help immediatley.
Thank you again for all your support!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2010): You don't. You should know you deserve to be treated better than this and leave him.
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (1 January 2010):
He has a weird kink / fantasy that in real life almost never works. He is so obsessed with it that he is manufacturing proof out of thin air. He needs a good solid dose of reality. probably needs some counseling. As far as the future of the relationship, it doesn't look good that he has such a strong desire for something that you really abhor. Fantasy is one thing but going through this is just going to be a mess.
FA
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2010): I feel very sorry that you are in this abusive relationship. You deserve better treatment than this.
The guy sounds like a sociopath or someone with a personality disorder, his behavior of wanting you to sleep with other men and then when you say no accuses you of sleeping around behind his back is a form of abuse.
He isn't going to change, it isn't your ability to "make" him think anything including trusting you. You have done nothing to make him distrust you but he has done plenty enough to you.
Get out now before you go crazy and forget what a real man is like because he isn't one.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (1 January 2010):
You cope with it by getting away from him. Do you really want to live the rest of your life with a who spies on you, accuses you, treats you badly? Or would you be better off moving on and finding a guy who isn't so insecure? Think carefully.
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