A
male
age
51-59,
*obronny
writes:i first realised i was gay when i was 17. i had a brother who was gay as well who lived in london but died of aids in 1995. which made it difficult for me to come out to my parents, subsequently i have never come out to them as they blamed themselves for his death and are both homophobic. but I've now met a man and fallen in love and we are both planning a future together. so all that in mind how should I come out to my parents? if its of any help I'm 40.
View related questions:
aids Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, bobronny +, writes (3 May 2009):
bobronny is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthankyou to all those who suplied advice me and my partner will take this advice and take our time to mull it all over and make the right disision when we are ready once again thankyou.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (28 April 2009):
Everyone seems to think this is pretty simple.
But I can see that this is going to be really horrible to do.
Have a think about whether it's best to speak to one parent or both.
I think it will also be a big judgement call on whether to mention the giant elephant in the room, which will be your bother and the risk of AIDS.
You need to tell them you are not your brother, you are not going to get AIDS and die. You need to tell them that this is not their fault.
It's going to be horrible and I really hope it will be ok.
But I don't think you could hide this, and I don't think it would be worth risking your relationship by asking him to live a lie.
You don't have to do it straight away though. Take your time and perhaps drop a few hints so it's not such a bombshell.
Good Luck!! xx
...............................
A
female
reader, crimson_kiss  +, writes (28 April 2009):
 I would have to agree. The best way is to be blunt about it, kind of like tearing off a band aid. Just state the facts and get it over with, don't prolong the agony.
...............................
A
female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (28 April 2009):
 Just admit it to them, maybe take time to introduce your partner later, because giving them two sets of news at the same time might be too much for them.
...............................
A
female
reader, Idiosyncratic +, writes (28 April 2009):
 If you've found love then it shouldn't matter what your parents think. Aslong as your happy then they shouldn't stop you, plus you're 40 and entitled to live your life the way you want. Good luck =)
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2009): Of course you should don't blame yourself for there homophobia tell them if they don't want to here it tell them that it is how you feel and they need to take your feelings into consideration
...............................
A
female
reader, bobbles32  +, writes (28 April 2009):
 Not sure if this is much help, but if it were me then I'd just be really blunt about it. Just let them know that you have found a partner, his name is bob or whatever. You're 40 and it's your life.
Congrats on the find! :)
...............................
|
