A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:How do I become a born again virgin I've been with a lot of guys and I'm now really starting to regret it I really want to change but I don't know how to make it official ? Can someone help me please? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2011): Saying you're celibate is ok but saying you're a born again virgin isn't. I don't agree with the concept of born again virginity at all. Hopefully now you understand why virginity carries so much weight. Sadly you're also going to learn that guys don't want relationships with promiscuous girls, and you're going to have to come to terms with that, when it happens.The best thing that you can do is to tell the truth, say to a guy that you've been around have been celibate for X long because you regret it wanted to change. And whatever you do don't lie because when the guy finds out you lied to him about something that's important he will likely dump you, right then and there, unless he has an equal if not greater sexual past than yours.
A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (11 January 2011):
 hi
you can't. once you've had sex you've had it. you (obviously) cannot go back in time, if you regret the sex then i'm sorry but there is no getting away from this, all you can do is behave differently in the future. you can have surgery to make your vagina as it was before sex, and you can lie to or at least 'not admit' to your future partner that you have not had sex, still doesn't make you a true virgin though
xx
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (8 January 2011):
 It's commendable that you want to turn over a new leaf. So, my compliments on that. But fair warning, it's not going to make every problem go away.
Born-again virgins are women who have accepted Christ as their personal lord and savior, and sworn off sex until marriage. Typically you have to be baptized for it. Pretty much, you're getting foriveness from Christ for your sins, and committing not to do with them. The first step is to admit that you have sinned in your past, to express regret, because it's wrong - *not* because you're worried what people will think.
It's not for everyone.
You may benefit from religion in general, but if you're only doing it to escape your past, I'll warn you, most guys will think it's nonsense. Outside the church, guys will not consider it real; within the church, most guys will still be holding out for actual virgins, or at least women with low numbers.
it may help you to find a guy, but it is not a get-out-of-jail-free card. You will not be instantly accepted by everyone for it. Still, doing it through a church means at least *some* people will buy into it. Simply announcing it yourself will only make people think you're nuts.
Talk to a priest about it, and be honest with him.
There is also hymen reconstruction surgery. From what I hear, it's painful to recover from, and then painful to get rid of, but I suspect the hymen isn't what you're doing this for.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2011): Just say you're celibate.
I don't know any guy that agrees with the concept of born again virginity. The whole reason virginity carries any weight in people's minds is because you only have that first experience one time.
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A
male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (8 January 2011):
 No such thing as a born-again virgin -- at least physically.
I think you can certainly change your ways, and stop the behavior that you were doing. Most "born again virgins" pledge that they won't have sex until marriage and to be honest, that's the best you can do right now.
Everyone makes mistakes, and it sounds like you've learned from them. That's part of growing up and maturing. Not everyone gets that opportunity or even has that capacity. They go on repeating the same mistakes.
I think you need to forgive yourself, work on your self-esteem, and figure out what you want out of relationship.
A trip to the book store may help you sort out what's going. I am sure there are plenty of books that you can find there that will help you work through this issue.
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A
male
reader, young_and_confused  +, writes (8 January 2011):
I believe it is going to be hard to do without support. Resolve, no matter how sincere, can fall away in the face of challenges if someone is used to old habits. Think about how many people addicted to drugs or alcohol go into rehab but then fall back to it.
To be successful in remaining a born again virgin, I think you need to:
1) Stay clear of men who are "players"
2) Associate with young men and women who share your beliefs
3) Consider going to a religious service, whatever your religion, where you will constantly have your beliefs reinforced
Have strength! It is possible!
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (8 January 2011):
 I had to google it to be sure and I found out that a born again virgin is, in fundamentalist Christian terms, someone with a promiscuous past ,who commits from now on to abstain from sex until mrriage.
If we were still in the 17th century you could have it publically announced in church , but now that will be neither necessary nor desirable.
You don't need to make any public announcement, if this is your decision all you have got to do is committing to it in your mind then stick to it. If you are requested for sex, you simply say no. And if somebody is so ungentlemanly to act surprised and bring up your turbulent past, you simply say : now I have changed my mind.
That's all it takes.
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