A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I'm having an affair with my neighbour. It's not something I'm accustomed or comfortable doing and I feel totally out of control. I've pushed my limits well to far and feel horrible. At the same time, I find I'm falling head over heels at an alarming, intense rate. He will be going away at the end of July and most likely not coming back for months at a time. I don't think I'm going to do well when he leaves...and part of me would really just like to leave with him. How do I keep from falling apart? How do I not think about him anymore? How do I get my old life back to being a good wife?Please don't bother helping by being nasty. I know what I'm doing is wrong. I'm trying to get back to the right side... it's just hard. Someone with any experience with this, please advise.
View related questions:
affair, married woman, neighbour Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, airwaterearthfirebender +, writes (15 June 2011):
 Are you expecting to just stop this affair and return to your husband and/or married life as if the affair never happened? ...Assuming you can even get over your neighbor?
It's funny, actually tragic, in how the perspective of the ones being lied to and figuratively f'd do not come into play.
Tell your husband what you have been up to and he'll make the decisions for you and render your current anxiety in what to do irrelevant. Are you getting me? Regardless of the reasons why you have been cheating, your husband should know the real you and decide for himself if he wants a lying cheater for a wife. Hey, he may well be a lying cheater himself and in that case you're a perfect match. But he may not be, he may actually think you love him. Either way, he deserves to be free of any lying and cheating from the likes of you. Come clean and let him make the decisions, the alternative is to keep living a lie and life of deception. How convenient it would be for you not to come clean and your husband to continue to falsely believe you are something you are not. On the flipside, coming clean may well be liberating for you and the spark that gets you to break away from your husband and the factors and beliefs that kept you there.
You can stop this affair
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2011): I think that God is giving you and opportunity to look at what you have done with some much needed space from your neigbhour. Running off with him would do know good now would it..so ignore that little thought for now.Take this opportunity to get back into the right side of life, whatever that means for you, don't anticipate whether you are going to stay or go, but just use the opportunity to take some space and take one day at a time. Really he doesn't sound like the best neighbour I hope you don't mind me saying. Take a deep breath and well done for wanting to have a good and proper life where you can enjoy yourself on the right track.
...............................
|
