A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I broke up with my boyfriend of 4 years a little over 6 weeks ago because we had been drifting apart and I had communicated to him what was happening. In the last six months of our relationship I told him that I was unhappy and I had been hearing things that he was supposively doing with other girls. I believed he was telling me the truth, but I was depressed becasue he never did antyhing for me and never spent any quality time with me. When I broke up with him I said its for good thats it. He did call here and there but I had support, then last weekend, I went out with a co-worker who was trying to show me that I don't need him or any other guy to have a good time. he treated me like a guy and it was great. Needless to say we ended up hooking up, and it was just a known truth, and we are able to work with one another with no awkwardness. but I am more depressed than ever and my ex-boyfriend wants nothing to do with me, which I can't blame him. But how am I suppose to be happy ever again. My ex-boyfriend, I thought was going to be the one, he just couldn't step up and now I am heart broken, I feel like I don't have a heart, I don't want to be alone, and I am so deperessed!!!! Please give me some good advice!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2008): I know how you must feel, when i broke up with mine it hurt like hell, but i found someone else too soon and now im emotionally attached to him but not happy, so be carefull. Since you are feeling vulnerable you will take any guy that makes you forget, but you might not choose right and thats worse. Try being byurself and tell me how it feels, one day i will have the balls to follow my own advice lol.
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (16 April 2008):
 When a door closes , another will open for you.
It is not the end of the world.
Be an optimist and think more positive.
Look for the silver linings in the dark clouds.
When you reached bottom, there is no more way down
and the only way is up again.
You are now having winter and summer will surely come.
Think of all those good things you enjoy doing or those
things which can bring joys and sunshine into your life.
Never give up and focus on God even when you see the storm brewing in your life.
It will soon past and you will enjoy life again.
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A
male
reader, binhquangdao +, writes (15 April 2008):
 here's my truthful answer you have to learn how to live happy by yourself first before you can live happily in a relationship. If you are not happy being by yourself you will bring that extra baggage into the relationship. if he doesn't love you more u need to move on you're young you still got a lot ahead of you. There's ppl here in their late 30 and 40 you need to date around and to be seriously honest be hurt so you can see who's the who and what to learn form every lesson. Every relationship is a lesson to be learn from until you find that one or one of the past relationship was the one it will come back hope this helps
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A
male
reader, 09876  +, writes (15 April 2008):
 Hey,
That sounds tough, believe me when I say I know how bad it hurts. The pain doesn't go forever though, it will fade away into nothing! I promise you.
It sounds like things with this guy weren't working, and you were right to break it off. You can't whip a dead horse.
Don't get caught up with feeling alone! I spent so much time feeling alone and searching for a girl. It was only when I stopped looking and accepted being single that someone came along.
Before you go into another relationship though, just remember that you can't be happy with someone else if your not happy with yourself first. Take some time off and treat yourself. Enjoy time with your friends and family. Best of luck kiddo
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (15 April 2008):
I broke up with the guy I thought I was going to marry in my late teens and I felt SO LOST. The world suddenly felt so big and scary. If I spoke to other guys it still felt like cheating and was really scary because dating at 20 is a LOT different to dating at 16.
You are grieving this guy because you had some good times and now he is gone. It is natural, but you have to keep your head up and not give into it. The fact you are being so mature and cool about your rebound guy shows to me you are going to be just fine.
And the good news is that you are going to start feeling better soon. You broke up for the right reasons, it wasn't working any more.
Suddenly you are going to think, "oh yeah I wanted to go and be a singer on a cruise ship in the Caribbean when I was younger but can't because of .... oh hang on, I'm single, now I can!!"
You can now do anything in the world. You can travel, you can go and do any job you want. You can make something of yourself and meet thousands of new people.
As for finding someone new, you won't want to for a while, but you will meet someone perfect for you. Maybe next month or maybe in 3 years time.
Don't worry and be happy.
Good Luck!! xx
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