A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Hi I am a 31 year old married guy. Successful carreer, beautiful loving wife and gorgeous 2 kids - whatever I do circles around them. I have known my wife since we were 15 - we were each other's first love and no one ever got between us. However, I recently I have started to crave somebody else - her brother! Yes her brother who is 23 years old and about to get married, unfortunately. I dont consider myself as gay or bisexual but I have feelings for him which sometimes make me go crazy for him. Deep down I think that he too fancies me and although we never said anything to each other, I am sure that he has some thoughts about me. Now that he is about to get married I am thinking much more about him and what I would like to do to him. My dream is to have a complete secret affair with my bro in law but i am scared that i will lose my wonderful wife and his friendship. As I said, we never said anything to each other but we do find excuses to hug or cuddle each other's shoulder in a friendly manner - i never do that to my friends anyway and i doubt that he does. My fantasies about him are driving me crazy and I am now getting really confused what I should do. I also have a reputation to keep and I have so much to lose, but cant stop thinking about him. I am sure that one day I will have to succumb to my wishes but I am already dreading that day - on the other hand I can't wait to have him. Secretly.
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female
reader, Ich_liebe_dich +, writes (28 September 2010):
Im with Tisha-1 goodluck
A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (28 September 2010):
Don't even think about having an affair with this man, first of all you may be completely wrong about his feelings for you he may just be an affectionet guy and treats all men like this (there are plenty of guys who hug platonicly). Secondly if you are right and something were to happen between you, your wife would lose you and her brother and you would lose everything. Because secrets like these always come out and put yourself in your wife shoes? She would be utterly shocked and her like would be destroyed. Maybe perhaps you got together with your wife at a really young age and now you want to start exploring sexually well my advice is dont think about cheating, if its a desire that you really need to do you must finish with your wife first and then take time to find out who you really are, because it sounds like you dont have a clue who you are or what you want, maybe go to a gay/bisexual clinic and discuss your feeling to them they will be able to help you deal with them professionally and more importantly it will be confident so you dont need to worry about anyone finding out, i really do feel sorry for you as you must feel so confused at the minute please go and talk to someone before you do something that will be the biggest regret of your life. Good Luck.
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj +, writes (28 September 2010):
"Deep down I think that he too fancies me"
"I am sure that he has some thoughts about me"
"we do find excuses to hug or cuddle each other's shoulder in a friendly manner"
You're heading into dangerous territory when you start making assumptions about what he is thinking and his intentions... are you a mind reader?? I'm also a bit worried here if you're basing this fantasy of him fancying you merely from him putting his arm over your shoulder occasionally... well hell... I better stop doing that with... er.. everybody!!!
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (28 September 2010):
So you're bored with your life? You want to shake things up and create some drama? Sounds like a brilliant waste of a perfectly good marriage to me.
I think you might want to see your doctor and see if you have any hidden medical conditions. I am not joking.
If you get the all-clear from the medico, make an appointment with a counselor and start exploring why you'd want to self-destruct, implode your marriage and destroy a family. Seems like a very bad idea to me, so once hormonal changes and a brain tumor is ruled out, perhaps you have some emotional issue that is setting you up for destruction.
Lay off any porno, for the time being and don't self-medicate with alcohol or weed or illegal drugs. Try some exercise and make sure you are eating right.
Clear enough?
1. See your doctor
2. See a mental health counselor such as a psychiatrist or psychologist
3. Avoid pornography, booze, drugs
4. Take care of your body
Good luck.
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