A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Please can you help me as I seem to be going mad!I have been with my fiance for 6 1/2 years. We got engaged last year. We have a really good relationship and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. The problem is a woman at his work. He currently works in a school and everybody is a woman except him and another teacher! Everybody else is really nice except one woman. She constantly texts my boyfriend, even up until 11 at night. Fair enough some of them are harmless, jokes, how are you? etc but some recently have said 'I really like your hair like that it looks really sexy' and are you going to be good on Friday night (he was having his leaving do on Friday). I mean what am I supposed to think about these texts? I have confronted him and he said they are completly harmless and she's just a mate like the other women in his work but I have a gut feeling about this woman and know she fancies him. After their night out on Friday, I saw a text on his phone that said 'I'm sorry I got upset, you just mean more to me than anybody else x' Again what am I supposed to think? I am really at the end of my tether. When speaking to my boyfriend about it on Saturday he said he won't text her anymore and will put a block on his phone (which we have rang the mobile company and we can't do it) so he said he will have a word with her on Monday and tell her to stop texting? Do I believe him?I have met this women loads of times so it's not like I'm a partner who they never see or don't know how serious we are. He has only got one week left in work so I know he won't have to see her anymore but in my eyes she can still text him. Any help on this matter please!!!!!!xxx
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2007): Hi - my boyfriend works in a hospital and is always telling me most of the people he works with are women. He has several female friends but I think it is inappropriate when he gets texts from them on a sunday night saying "how are you? xxx" I told him its unacceptable whether they are friends or not and he started to simply not reply to them. I'm still suspiscious though and thats the shame of it - we are made to distrust our fellas by these 'intruders'. Your boyfriends texts are not acceptable - no way. It is more than obvious that she is trying to get her claws into him - he's not available though. She is a predatory woman. My advice? He needs to text her back to stop texting - and do this in front of you and let you read the reply. Then if he gets another one I suggest you call her and confront her and ask her why she is doing this. That might be enough. Your boyfriend is being weak - very weak. You don't need to be. Good luck.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2007): Hi tell him to get a new sim card and change his number and only give it out to family etc if he agrees to this and she still texts him then you know he is cheating on you simple as that, even if there is no physical contact between the 2 of them he should not be texting her or answering her texts good luck to you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2007): yes she can text him, and yes she might fancy the pants off him but it sounds like she isn't getting anywhere so you have nothing to worry about- you fancy him so you have to accept that other people will too, it's you he wants to marry so forget about her
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (15 July 2007):
About what to think about the texts from this woman, obviously she wants to be involved with him. And these are not innocent messages, since she knows your boyfriend is with you.
Maybe your boyfriend hasn't been as strong as he should have been about these messages. If he had been, she would have stopped; however, I'm sure you know that people just don't care what they are told.
Something happened between this woman and your boyfriend, or she wouldn't have sent the message about being upset. Whatever it was, it wasn't enough to prevent communication between the two, but obviously something happened. Apparently she is not getting what she wants, or at least not all she wants.
Maybe your boyfriend is indeed innocent, but I'm afraid that, at the very least, he should be doing a lot more to stop this woman. And, his leaving the school does not necessarily mean he will stop seeing her or she will stop texting her, in case something is going on between the two (which might be the case, but I cannot be sure).
You should talk to your fiancé and tell him that this is affecting you. If he cares about you, I'm sure this will stop.
Hope this helps.
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