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age
41-50,
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writes: He told me we might meet at the weekend ( this was via FB chat) and then nearing the time he didn't call or text AT ALL? On chat, he told me it was fun we got together the other day :) Was he being polite or is he playing hard to get now? I still like him although it's not really clear why he's acting hot and cold like that. I know for one that he was very busy moving house and starting a new job...shall I just ignore him and wait for him to make the first move? And if I ever hear from him again, what should I do given that I'm still interested?! This guy's got a pattern, he plays hide and seek with me and always surprises me after a phase of no contact to a move that steps the whole game, I'm not sure if it's one of those this time though. It's been a week.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhe emailed me and texted me apologising for not staying in touch with me in the last ten days after our second date. He said he can't explain in a message or email and enquired how I'm doing and if I've got any plans. Just a reminder to all of you out there trying to help, I told him not to call me because I hate mobile phones and only use them as an answering machine. Should I email him back and how long should I wait to reply since he's left me high and dry for ten or so days?! I would want him to contact me again via mobile, as I think I was asking too much of him not to and confused him and he might have seen this as a sign of disinterest. Any comments welcome and would be greatly appreciated in fact. x
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAs someone who played the hot and cold game (and my ex dedicated the katy perry song to me) I can tell you that this game is only played by:
1- people with fear of rejection
2- people with fear of commitment
3- people looking for an ego boost, they first make you fall for them so you chase after them.
4- people who have option A, but want you to be their option B just in case
5- people looking for sex only.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks all. Here's a useful link,I just checked it out :)
http://jessmccann.hcibooks.com/category/mixed-signals/
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2012): Don't bother with him. If he is interested he'll be in touch. Seems he is lukewarm. Unless he shows a bit of full-on enthusiasm I'd cast him adrift.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2012): "Was he being polite or is he playing hard to get now?"
Suspect neither, probably had you pencilled in as Plan B in case he struck out wherever he went out without you.
"This guy's got a pattern, he plays hide and seek with me and always surprises me after a phase of no contact to a move that steps the whole game"
See above.
Don't understand all the hand-wringing "why didn't he call" postings. One of the many things I'll never get about women is why they ALWAYS need an explanation from a guy now matter how rude or inconsiderate or boorish the bahavior. Women don't need words to explain a guy's actions, his ACTIONS explain his actions. And no, he doesn't care how you "feel," that's why he didn't call or text.
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A
male
reader, Kyle007  +, writes (22 January 2012):
Ask yourself if you really want the rest of your relationship to be like this. Tell him you want someone who will communicate with you regularly.
For me personally, someone has to make it clear to me that she is interested for me to hang on to her.
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