A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I bumped in to my first love after 24 years, for two years our lives have been like a rollercoaster. He has now left and gone back to his wife 28 times. I have told him to leave me alone that I have had enough, but he will go a few days and then his constant ringing or texting will start. I am sure he does this to his wife when he is with me. His wife is divorcing him, but keeps calling it off when he goes back. I want to get on with my life with or without him, what do I do!
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (1 April 2011):
 I'm sure it's "easier" to be mad at "the other woman" rather then her husband.. after all she has to LIVE with him.
Just ignore the both of them and stay away from married men in the future. Less drama & less heart ache, I'm willing to bet.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe still texts and phones, I ignore them all, I even text his wife to tell him to stop, she blamed me!!!! It is my fault that he is still texting. She will never blame him for the damage he has caused, just me!!!! We never stood a chance
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2011): This has really helped me reading this I am in a simliar situation his wife has filed for divorce three times and my husband has our divorce on file still. But she has ended the divorce proceedings twice. This last breakup has left me raw and a mess. I have found that writing a journal and blocking his text messages is the best medicine. I will be starting therapy to find out why I let this guy in my life for three years. My ex beau and his wife are both sick I want no part of the drama and am trying my best to pick up the pieces and realize what I had in front of me this whole time with my husband something real not a lie. If he still divorces me I deserve it and will work to never end up in such a relationship again with a married man. Good luck to you and run like the wind girl.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionEverything that you have all commented on is true, thank you, I cant defend the fact that I went for a married man,
we went out for six years before we both got married. He has said that by going back to his wife he is doing what his family want of him (irish catholic). The door is well and truely shut this time.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2011): If he went back to his wife 28 times..That means you took him back 28 times....If you are not there he will not come back...So make sure you are in no way available to this unstable fella....You do know that dating a married man is wrong though, so make sure you avoid them in future....Learn from this ...Goodluck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2011): I thought you were someone I knew. Then I realized she had been in that situation much longer, like seven years. Don't let that be you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you people, I know what you are saying is right. I have spoken to my friend tonight, she said the same. so here goes, time to let go! Thanks again
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (27 March 2011):
NO contact. That is what I would do. Change your phone number, block his number, delete his email, facebook EVERYTHING, tell him if him you don't want anything to do with him.
He keeps going back to her, because SHE lets him. And you, do the same.
STOP talking to him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2011): Dont have any conact with him any more and find some one else who is single.
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (27 March 2011):
 Get on with your life without him...he went back to his wife 28 times. Frankly no-one should have to deal with that. I feel sorry for his wife the most - the whole situation must drive her mental! Maybe their marriage is just based on this whole row-separate-reunite destructive drama cycle, or maybe he goes back because he thinks she will take all his money in the divorce courts. Either way it is madness to TAKE HIM BACK 28 times...it is time to get a grip because you are a grown woman and need to get the self respect to say no to shoddy treatment. If he really wanted to be in a serious relationship with you then he would have left and stayed that way. He knows your door is always open so he behaves erratically because he can! If he rings your phone, ask the telephone company to block his calls. I strongly suggest you change the locks, padlock the door, change your phone number and shut off those heart-strings...let the distress married couple get on with their lives and leave him alone.
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A
female
reader, JustKalie1010  +, writes (27 March 2011):
 If I were you, I would probably just tell him you've had enough and find someone better :)
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A
male
reader, garcypher +, writes (27 March 2011):
He obviously still has something for his wife regardless of you. Most people would have finished him after going back lets say twenty times. Well a few.
I've seen these kind of relationships before, were the wife is always on the scene and no sighn of divorce. He is keeping his options open. and why has she not moved on? Finish it or accept it. They are your only options.
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