A
female
age
36-40,
*helyn
writes:My bf and I have gone out over a year now and have been thru ups and downs. I love him dearly and I believe he does. He loves facebook and is very active to a point I can not accept. He is very cautious and protective about his facebook, whenever he uses my laptop he never fails to logout from his account, and seem to use it discreetly hoping I dont notice. When i ask to see his inbox (i know i shouldn't but his actions have provoked and raised suspicion) he gets defensive, calling me crazy for being insecure and to intrude. This argument happened few times and I always end up not seeing his facebook. I know i shouldnt doubt but his defensiveness and discreetness really disturbs me and I feel so hurt by it as if he has something to hide. He said I cannot raise this issue anymore because its inappropriate and say he wont take my attitude. I love him so much to even give him my passwords but not the same with him.. I feel so hurt because I'm very sensitive and can be jealous easily because of his flattering attitude towards his females friends.. I wish someone could help..
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facebook, insecure, jealous Reply to this Question
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male
reader, the_phoenic +, writes (6 December 2010):
many men and boys are protective regardign their facebook accounts and their e-mails yet they have never cheated on thier spouses
and you mentioned that you are already having jeallousy issues with him and that would make him even more and more protictive regarding his facebook account
finally i think if you manged the jeallousy issues that you both have he might let you sneek on his account
Good Luck
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2010): I would say, ask to be added as a facebook friend so you can see his posts etc. If he won't add you as a friend, then why not? You would be wise then to worried.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2010): Its def a possibility he's hiding something. You should properly ask him what is going on and ask him to be honest. Dont accuse him mind you but figure out where the trust issue is between u two.
I keep my fb private from women im involved with simply cause I like to keep the relationships between me and them private and they absolutely respect it. I dont like ppl asking me questions and all that, plus im never one to have his ego stroked or like it.
His situation is perhaps obviously different than mine so do sit him down and calmly speak to him. If he is unable to address the manner appropriately Id say he's immature and thus that should be a red flag for you. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Nime  +, writes (6 December 2010):
 He's definitely hiding something, so if I were you I'd just leave now. But if you want to know with who and how many girls he's been chatting up so you can throw it in his face before you leave him, then I'd check to see if his password to facebook was saved in whatever browser he was using on your laptop; if not, install a keylogger.
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A
female
reader, Marzela +, writes (6 December 2010):
If he doesnt let you see his facebook im sure hes hiding something. Just tell him how you are feeling, and remember guys sometimes flirt with other girls online so i think thats what he is doing.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2010): I would say he is definitely hiding something. Someone you're in a relationship with should be your friend on FB, without any question.
That said, FB can still create problems even if you are friends there! I advise to avoid these sites for the most part, they have ruined many relationships unfortunately.
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A
female
reader, xanthic +, writes (6 December 2010):
 Does he let you see his page at all? Assuming he doesn't, here's my two cents:
If he had nothing to hide, there would be no reason for him to be so secretive. There's definitely something on there he doesn't want you to see, either because you'd disapprove or because it's something he knows he shouldn't be doing. After all, you wouldn't be 'insecure' about anything if he wasn't so defensive in the first place.
There's not much you can do if he's not willing to acknowledge the problem.
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