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age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I have feelings for my friend of over a year and recently he admited he has feelings for me to. It is really important for me that he asks me out because he is shy and it would show me that he cares about me as much as I do him and it would show me that he wants to me with me. How can I let him know that I want him to ask me out without having to say to him, "i want you to ask me out"?
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male
reader, daletom  +, writes (5 January 2008):
Am I that shy guy by any chance? I think you're making good progress, but let me back up to the original question and make a suggestion that might help others who come upon this thread in the future.
"Jamer70" gave a pretty good answer. But I found it a little easier when a mutual acquaintance acted as something of a go-between. A shy guy is the last person who'll be able to read your mind, and might actually interpret sincere flirtation as making fun of him. A third person could honestly say to him - without risking an embarrassing face-to-face encounter between you and him - something like "You know, she's kind of attracted to you and hopes you'll ask her to watch the chess match together. She'll probably be waiting at the bus stop around 4:30, if you're interested." OK, maybe not quite that direct but you get the idea. With that information, Shy Guy can plan what he wants to say, when, and where, and have some assurance that he won't be rejected.
A
female
reader, tytoalba  +, writes (4 January 2008):
 Your welcome, please dolet me know how it goes!
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for all your encouragement it means a lot. I appreciate everything you all said, and thank you for responding to my response tytoalba! I'll let you know how it goes!
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female
reader, tytoalba +, writes (2 January 2008):
That's a good idea, it will probably encourage him enough to ask you out.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYa I think he will .. I mean he's painfully shy and never had a relationship, and I'm not against asking him myself, but if I ask him then I'll never know if he wanted to be with me for me .. or because he doesn't know how to say no. I think I'm going to ask him what he's been thinking since we confessed our feelings .. what I'll do from there I have no idea lol
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female
reader, tytoalba +, writes (1 January 2008):
You could try to say something really deep, do you think he needs any time to prepare? When I confessed my feeling to my ex, the next day he asked me out, though, the conversation beforehand was him trying to see how I felt.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell about two and a half weeks ago I confronted him and said "I know in my heart of hearts that you like me" and he said "Yes I do like you" so we both know how the other one feels, I just don't know how to let him know I want him to ask me.
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female
reader, tytoalba +, writes (1 January 2008):
Well I think you should let him know you like him but if he's really really shy let him hang a little after you tell him, preferably on the phone that way you give him time to compose himself so that he can feel that he does it right when when he asks you. Give him a huge hint if you're real shy while at the same time being subtle.Ex.: "You know I've always thought people with *insert color of his eyes/hair* eyes/hair" then blush or fidget with your hair or something that would make you seem like you're a bit embarressed but do not seem like you regret what you said. In essence, you are coyly and flirtatiously complementing him and encouraging him to ask you out while at the same time not actually jumping out there and saying, "Hey, I want you to ask me out!"Hope I helped. PM me if you need anything else or need a different way to go about this.
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male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (31 December 2007):
 Well you could flirt with him and drop him hints about you liking him. But since he is shy it might not help him get over his shyness. The best thing to help him is to just ask him out yourself, rather than hope he would ask you out.
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