A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I know I shouldn't but I've been hacking into my boyfriends email account and recently found emails to another woman which imply they have had a previous encounter (not sure how long ago) but my boyfriend has told the woman I will be working away from home next week and suggested they meet up.I really don't know what to do, I guess it serves me right for looking at his email and now I can't mention this without him knowing that I've done this - what should I do?I feel sick after reading these notes Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2009): thanks so much for all the replies, I'm still thinking about what to do! I think I will go with the first reply that I need something concrete before confronting him.
thanks x
A
female
reader, always.you +, writes (10 June 2009):
 you need to make sure something is actually going on first i think. you should do number2 on what honeypie posted. see if you can find where there going and go have looksee.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (10 June 2009):
 What do you want to do? You have a couple of choices.
1. you confront him now. ( he will most likely turn it around on you and make you feel like the bad guy because you snooped.) And yes, when you snoop you sometimes find stuff you really didn't want to know.
2. You keep quiet and find a way to be at the location where they meet up. ( if you see the details)
3. You ignore it and he will cheat on you every chance he gets.
Do you see a future with this man? Do you think he will never do it again? Do you think he can ever re-gain your trust? Is he worth the drama?
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A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries  +, writes (10 June 2009):
 definately confront him!!!
he's clearly on the verge of cheating and you've caught him before hand!!
doesn't matter you hacked him otherwise if you wouldn't have how else would you have known?
i am sure he wouldn't have told you.
confront him and dump his sorry behind!!
he can't go emailing girls telling them your away on business and inviting strange girls over whilst your out to your home!!
that's so wrong and so unfair on you!
definately tell him no matter you've done it's not half as bad as what he's going to do.
Hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2009): To be honest you're never gonna trust him again so can you really continue with this relationship? The way i see it, if you compare the two things you have done- him trying to cheat or having cheated and you hacking his emails, which do you think is worse? The same thing happened with my boyfriend when i went through his phone and found sexual texts, his first instinct was to turn it round and blame me saying that things would be fine if i hadnt gone through his phone and he couldnt be with someone that did that! I blamed myself at first but then I realised that a. what he did was far worse than what i had done and b. he did what he did first otherwise i would have had nothing to find!
It will eat you up if you dont mention it and how are you going to feel while you are away knowing that he is possibly cheating?? The only thing I would say though is is there anything concrete or is there even a remote possibility it could just be friendly? You dont really want to confront him without something definate otherwise he may be able to worm out of it and turn the blame round on you x
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