A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ok, so i'm 18 and i've been talking to this boy for three months nbow.. and he's really nice and sweet but might be a little bit clingy because he's not really been in a real relationship. he's going off to colege in two days and he's been trying to see but i dont want to see him (i have no idea why i feel like this)... and lately everything he does annoys me like he texts me everyday and he calls me every night.. its starting to get on my last nerve.. another thing is that i hate boys that pay me too much attention.. it gets weird after a while and soon we'll have nothing to say when he calls.. my question is how do i tell him that i dont want to be with him because im not ready and he's also going off to college.. please help me he's super sweet and nice and i dont want to lose him..!
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you so much im going to try using your advice today.. im super nervous though because i dont want to say the wrong thing. he leaves for college in two days and i want everything to be normal between us.. i'll let you know how it goes..
A
male
reader, LittleAlfie +, writes (16 August 2010):
 I think a series of small conversations is key here. I'd start by explaining that you really appreciate your space. Tell him it's nothing he did, rather just who you are. If he can't respect that, then he'll probably continue pestering you. If he persists you simply need to ignore him. That will drive him over the edge. But it'll pay off in the long run. A man falling over the edge is very open and tend to reveal everything you need or want to know about him, and that will help you decide if you really want to be with him. I'd suggest a nice lunch or a walk in a public area. It's personal and private enough to open a really good dialogue, yet staying active and in a public setting will help keep things from becoming incredibly awkward. It should put both of you in a positive enough place to really evaluate how you want to continue your relationship.
Side note: I know it's cliche, but refrain from using "you" terms. Try to avoid saying things like "you need to leave me alone". Rather say "I need to feel like an individual in a relationship, not owned by one.".
I hope this helps. Let me know how things turn out.
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