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He's obsessed with sleeping around! Can he still be in love though?

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Question - (6 July 2009) 3 Answers - (Newest, 6 July 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

how is it possible that a man can ever be truly committed to someone when they're all so obsessed with sleeping around? how can a man fall in love with anyone, when all they're concerned with is tits and ass? i know it happens--that men fall in love.

but i don't ever want to sleep with one, for fear of just becoming a notch on someone's belt. for fear of being just another piece of ass. i always fall for guys that i have some sort of friendship relationship with (like he's an acquaintance of a friend, we met at a party, we know the same people, etc...), and i'm worried that if i sleep with them, then they'll pretend as though nothing happened, tell everyone i know we slept together and i'll be totally embarassed and hurt.

i'm not looking for a "lets be together" conversation the day afterwards, but some sort of indication that there will be some pursual or at least dignity and acknowlegement to the situation. the least a guy can do is say "i'm sorry it won't work out" instead of just not call or worse, ignore you and then tell everyone how obsessed you are just to make him sound like a big shot.

how can i avoid this?

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A female reader, SirenaBlusera Mexico +, writes (6 July 2009):

SirenaBlusera agony auntI think that men are stereotyped as sex-obsessed, but that stereotype is unfair.

I think that men are more reluctant to discuss their feeligs pour their hearts out, because it makes them feel vulnerable. There are differences between men and women, but men have feelings too, they're just not as open.

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A female reader, Blondy United States +, writes (6 July 2009):

Blondy agony auntThis is a disgusting generalization, I would really listen to what satindesire said because she worded it perfectly. Every single person in this world is differnet, true that some people have the same habits as others, but that in no way gives anyone the right to condemn the entire male population based on how some of them act does it?

Also, there are plenty of women who are looking for nothing more than sex. Girls that go out looking to screw, get what they want, and never speak to the guy again. Its not JUST men and its not ALL men, it is certain PEOPLE who do it because thats just how they are living their life. Don't sleep with those types of people if it offends you so, but don't say that ALL men are like that either because that is completely false. There are SO many decent men out there who want to fall in love and have a meaningful relationship. My advice would be to find those men because that is what you are looking for.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2009):

Lol, my ex is exactly like that, it's pretty disgusting. For guys like him, it's either deal with it or get the fuck out. The nice guys are always the ones to get rejected. Well, not always. In my opinion, I say just be happy that you're single and not with a guy who makes you miserable. I've only had one sex partner in my life (my ex and I'm 19.5 years old); I'm not in a rush to have sex with the next guy I see. Don't worry about sex for now. You're still young and still alive and kickin'!

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