A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I am new to this forum and would really appreciate some help.I am attracted towards a man whom I know for more than 2 years, I can tell that there is a spark between us. However, until now we have been like friends. He has never touched me in what ever way. When I met him recently and he all of a sudden gave me a hug. I am confused.. does this hug mean something different? Is he trying to convey a message?Does he like me?
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female
reader, kaylagal  +, writes (6 August 2009):
 I wouldn't make anything out of a hug. If you've been friends for two years and a hug is all you have, then there's nothing between you and him.
Good luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2009): In light of the fact, that he has never, ever touched you in any way...I can really understand why one would view this 'hug' as an opening to bigger and better things. A good test, is to initiate the hug next time you see him...and see how he reacts to that approach. If he seems tense and cool to the hug, then I would say he wants to slow it down a notch. He is satisfied with what he has with you..which is friendship. If he's interested in you as a love interest, he'll be all warm and appreciative. Because his feelings would bubble to the surface. I mean, if you are the one, he won't be able to help himself, would he.
It's been my experience that when men want a woman, they will not stick her in the 'friendship' zone. They go after what they want, believe me. 2 years of knowing you is a plenty of time to him deciding whether you are the one he possibly wants to date...so if he's not forthcoming and responsive soon (within the next few weeks) then stop sitting there wasting your time, awaiting his decision. Accept that friendship is all he wants. And then, get out there, have a fun life and date other fellows.
But before you do that I do say, I like emily's suggestion...about asking him out for a drink. While that's a more bolder way of finding out as well..it takes a lot of guts as many of us humans fear the rejection factor, but if you feel good about yourself and can accept his answer either way...give it a whirl, girl! And smile brightly..laugh and whatever his answer is..you will know which life 'path' to go on...right?
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (6 August 2009):
To be honest, a hug always seems like more of a friendly gesture than a romantic one.
I hug my friends with no problem where as I keep my distance with people I like.
It depends what the hug was like. If he held you close for just a bit too long, then yes it might have meant something. If he just hugged you then it was probably just a friendly thing.
Why don't you just tell him you really fancy a drink after work tonight and would he like to come too?
See what happens.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2009): Nowhere near enough info here to reach a conclusion. Hugs are very neutral and generally don't imply anything sexual. He may like you, of course. You say there's a spark. Subtly let him know you like him, keep up the eye contact, maybe find other subtle ways of physically touching, and see if yu're getting more definite signals. But don't read too much into a hug.
Good luck
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2009): The best way to find out is to ask him.
I suppose if he cupped the cheeks of your arse in his hands and pulled you towards him when he gave you this hug it could be an indication that he likes you a little bit.
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