A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey!! Ok....so i'm really confused and need all the advice i can possibly get!Basically...theres this guy that i kinda got together with at the end of summer..but then he had to go back to wales and i'm still here in London. But..we kept it going as a long distance thing...it was nothing serious..but recently a few weeks back he said he was having second thoughts and we should just be friends because he doesn't want to be committed to someone he only sees rarely. So..it was over. But for the past 2 weeks he has been changing his mind saying we should give it a go...then he says its not gonna work...then he says if i come and visit we can see how it goes coz he likes me...so basically contradicting statements. I think he's confused ...just as i am coz he's only 20 as well.But the thing is that i DO like him so i do want it to work if there is any way it can. The current situation is that i decided to call him and speak to him properly over the weekend and get to the bottom of this coz its been dragging on for too long now. So...i text him basically saying to let me know when is a good time to call him....he replied back instantly saying 'i'm not into you'...which i found very rude seeing as i was being nothing but polite. So..as i was angry..i replied a few hours later saying 'i was texting to see how you were. the least i expected was common manners. get the eff over yourself.'....and he then replied straight away saying 'no i'm sorry. i didnt mean to insult you. that was my friend texting'.... then i got even more annoyed and i text him saying 'why the hell was your friend texting me? if you dont have the decency to say what u feel yourself dont get your friends to do it for you. its quite pathetic'....and he simply replied saying 'well sorry'.So my question is that what do i do now? Coz if there is any way i would like it to work...BUT i dont wanna appear clingy! Please helppp...
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female
reader, Another_Kapiti  +, writes (16 November 2009):
 I agree with the previous poster. Why would you voluntarily put yourself with someone who treats you this badly? Long distance is very very difficult, even if you're head over heels in love, it's hard!
Besides, you only have his word that it was a friend texting you and not him. I personally would tell you to run away as fast as your legs will carry you! Don't text him again, you'll end up as the butt of the joke, and you deserve so much more than that! I hate to say it, but he's acting like a twat. He sounds more like he's 16 than 20!
Let us know what you decide to do or if you need answers other than what has already been replied to. AK.
A
female
reader, pinktopaz  +, writes (16 November 2009):
You don't do anything now! Get over this guy! If you keep trying to go after a guy that can't make up his mind, that is stringing you along and supposidly has friends texting you from his phone and he doesn't really give you a sincere apology, then that is pretty clingy behavior in itself. Both you and I know that there are plenty of guys that are local to you that wouldn't treat you that way, so don't settle on this guy. Trust me, no matter what you do, he's going to keep acting like this...even if you give him the silent treatment and he comes begging for you to come back him, he'll do the same thing, he's highly immature.
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