A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 18 and i have recently been having sex with this guy who's 1 yr older than me and found out he gave me chlamydia when i confronted him about it he didn't really seem to be bothered (he knew he had it), worst thing is he was in a relationship with a girl who's only 16 and she's pregnant. This means that there is a big possibility that she may have it and it might affect her baby which i think would be really bad. I know its not my business to tell her, but she is my sister's friend and even though i have been having sex with her boyfriend (which i already know is really horrrible and bitchy of me) i wouldn't want to harm her baby at allshould i tell her because he has told me that he isn't going to tell her?? please help!
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female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (6 December 2009):
 You did the right thing. Try to think of it this way, if you hadn't been tested and found to have chlamydia, this girl might never have known. So in a twisted, weird way, you have done her a favor. You may have prevented the baby being born with major issues.
And in this way, you have also found out what can happen with STDs and sex, a huge life lesson. I'm sure you will never forget it.
Take care.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all your advice guys i have decided told her she told me that she knew he was up to something and she kind of guessed i was sleeping with him and that she will be going to get tested a.s.a.p
she was very upset which and i've neer felt so bad in my life, i have definately learnt my lesson from this and just hope her and the baby are fine :( x
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A
male
reader, mnman3487 +, writes (5 December 2009):
 Well, if you must tell her via text message (which is understandable) then start off by introducing yourself. You say she's your sister's friend, so hopefully that will instill trust in her. Tell her that it's come to your attention that she's been sleeping with this guy and that you have too but you didn't know that they were together. Then tell her that you're really sorry but he gave you an STD that could harm her baby and that she needs to get checked out by a doctor. If she has any judgement of character she'll realize that you're trying to help her. Then at the very least your conscience will be clear.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni am deciding to tell her in a text message (i got her number of my sister) im too much of a coward to face her and tell her because i know what i have done is terrible however i dont really know what to say to her shall i just tell her straight away that she might have chlamydia or start of with telling her i have been sleeping with her bf. :(
i dont know how to tell her xx
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A
female
reader, Carrot2000 +, writes (4 December 2009):
 You need to tell her. She may hate you for sleeping with her boyfriend--and even accuse you of giving him the STD--but it's the right thing to do for the baby.If she chooses not to act on this information, that's on her. At least you did the right thing.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (4 December 2009):
You absolutely have to tell her. Not to do so could lead to severe consequences for her and the baby.
"....chlamydia may cause premature births (giving birth too early) and the infection can be passed along from the mother to her child during childbirth, causing an eye infection, blindness, or pneumonia in the newborn." (from webmd.com http://www.webmd.com/sexual-conditions/chlamydia )
And for heaven's sake, part of being a responsible adult is to take the consequences of your choices. His tactic of avoidance is COMPLETELY reprehensible. He is lower than a maggot for not acknowledging what he has potentially brought on her. I already have a low opinion of him for cheating on her, he's now contemptible for possibly sentencing this girl to infertility and this unborn baby to completely unnecessary medical issues just because he's a craven coward.
I probably would make sure EVERYONE who might have sexual contact with the creep know he's got chlamydia; he may be a one-man plague who creates sorrow and spreads disease, so his potential victims should have the chance to avoid him.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2009): Maybe you could get your sister to tell her something like, "You need to get checked." But yes, someone does need to tell her.
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A
male
reader, mnman3487 +, writes (4 December 2009):
My personal opinion: absolutely you should tell her. He made it your business when he slept with both of you, without telling either of you about his disease. If she knows about it far enough before the birth of the child, doctors could prescribe, treat and possibly cure it without harming the child, an effort worth far more than this greaseball. I can tell you're a good girl and your heart is in the right place, so just ask yourself. What is the right thing to do? You know the answer.
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