A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i've been in a 3 year relationship with this guy. while dating, we hung out, had fun, and would come in late or not at all. now, we reside with one another, have children together, and he continues to do the same thing minus not coming in. in a past relationship, i had a guy lie to me probably throughout our relationship. i trust my man, i believe what he tells me, but when he comes in at 3am, 4am, and 4:30am, i think back to what i went through in the past and i have a problem with that. i don't put anything past anybody. am i wrong for thinking this way? do i have trust issues? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, SueZ  +, writes (24 August 2010):
Hey, you are not the problem here... not your past either.
Geting home at the wee hours of the night is not acceptable when he is doing it more than once.
You deserve better. If I was in your place, I would let him know what I expected and if he did not change I would ask him to leave.
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (24 August 2010):
 Every girl has or has had some trust issues at one point in there life. I know it's hard not to compare the past to the now, but think it's the past for a reason and it's not fair to compare relationships like that. You have children and he's coming home that late or not at all. Unless, he's working late what's his excuse when you ask him? Can't say he's cheating but does it cross your mind? Sure, but you don't have any evidence. I wouldn't approve of it or let it go on any further, put your foot down and tell him he needs to start coming home at a reasonable time or he will be locked out of the house next time he does it. Doesn't need to be coming home that late disturbing the kids sleeping or you.
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A
female
reader, answerfromtheheart +, writes (24 August 2010):
 Just to verify, now you live together and have children, but he still goes out without you and comes home at 3,4am?
Do you not think that this is inappropriate?
I think it's ok to go out without your partner but have the decency to come back at a reasonable hour not to make them worry.
I don't think it's your previous relationship issues. what he is doing doesn't seem right by you.
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