A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I just moved into an apartment with a room-mate. And there's been a situation that I would like your opinion on:My room-mate came home after being gone for a week, and discovers some boxes for him on his bed, that he ordered. So he asks me if I accepted his delivery and placed the boxes in his room. I didn't. I haven't ever even been inside his room. The landlord doesn't even live in this city, so hadn't done it. Then I get accused of having left the door unlocked! And I get a text from the landlord that I need to be more careful with locking the doors. I haven't come home to find the door unlocked a single day, I would have reacted if I did. I have my lap top just laying about in the open on the kitchen table in addition to having other valuables in the apartment. I would have reacted if I came home to find the door unlocked. So which is more likely:1. My room-mate already got his delivery before he left, and just forgot about it2. I left the door unlocked, and came home to find it unlocked, but am so aloof I don't react to it or remember it, AND the delivery person just walked into the apartment, into the room of my room-mate and placed the boxes on his bed (which strikes me as odd and highly unprofessional if was the case)3. The delivery man came into the apartment and into the room and left the boxes there while I was in the apartment myself, but didn't ring the door bell, and I didn't hear him (because some times when I am at home myself, I have left the door unlocked)The apartment is tiny. The door bell is right outside the door. And the door bell is loud, I can not have missed it. In addition, there are two more doors that automatically lock themselves, one being the gate to the buildings, and one being to the building itself, before you reach the door to the apartment. Also, the delivery man would have given him a call to let him know he was arriving with the delivery, wouldn't he, in order to check that he was at home to accept the delivery?So, is it more likely that I am aloof and leave doors unlocked, or that my room-mate got the delivery before he left, and then forgot about it? Or could there be another explanation?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2016): How many people have keys to the flat?
What right did your flatmate have in complaining about you to the landlord?
If $300 went missing from his room or the kitchen who would get the blame?
If the police asked the landlord whether you were reliable at locking up the flat, what would the landlord answer?
Your flatmate has taken a break, got his parcels and undermined your ability to safeguard yourself and landlords property all while being absent and thats ok by everyone?
What do your family think of it?
Is this a practical scenario for the future and if so what is right about it?
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (25 June 2016):
 Someone who comes through a third floor window bringing in boxes ?...
Santa Claus and his elfs ! I see that you are in Norway, somewhat close to the North Pole... so that is a distinct possibility :) .
This guy is a bit weird, but I think ( and hope for you ) not a dangerous psycho as suggested by other respondents. Just one of those pesky fusspots that love to stir up trouble for nothing. Since there have been other 4 people coming and going from this apartment, chances are that any one of them ( parents, friend, landlord ) has admitted the delivery man in and misplaced some boxes, and now they either don't remember ( improbable , but moving out/ in can be very hectic and confusing ) or , they realized they screwed up and are not 'fessing up.
I think your roommate realized this perfectly, but he is standing his ground because a ) he is one of those people who can't ever admit they are wrong and apologize or b ) does not want to shame or antagonize his parents, friend and landlord.
This may not warrant your immediate desperate escape from this place, ... but surely it does not particularly point out to a happy, serene cohabitation for the future, so if you want to start having a look at those " for share " ads....:)
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123 +, writes (25 June 2016):
 It's so ridiculous that is almost starting to become funny now! I would have asked "is he mad?" but clearly that ship has sailed.
He's not just loony, he's also deluded and scary and you definitely need to bolt out of the doors. Look for a new place, have no contact with him and while you are there in that apartment with him, avoid him completely.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (25 June 2016):
 Definitely time to look elsewhere for a room/place to live.
Who the HAY HAY thinks a delivery service will get out a ladder and put packages through an open window? And how would they know which bedroom is his?
It's preposterous and delusional.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2016): Dude you need to move like yesterday.This dude is so mentally ill that he could be very dangerous.People like him hear voices and can get very violent.He sounds like he might have something like schizophrenia.Do not give him your new address for your own safety.The reason I say this is what you wrote about this so called company.Leave be safe now.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIt gets better. He now believes they broke in through a window he had left open in his room. Its beyond crazy, but at least in this latest theory, Im not to blame. And he did leave a window open, apparently. Which means someone could have broken in. Which means he is the irresponsible one. But if someone broke in through a window, needing a ladder to get in too, they wouldnt have done it to deliver packages. He thinks the company is trying to cover it up too, because he said he called them, and they coulndt find his order.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2016): I would fix up new accomodation asap.
Firstly this guy has spread the rumour that you dont lock the doors.
This means he cannot be trusted.
He has created a potential alibi for himself if he embarks on any form of wrong doing towards you or the flat.
So check out of there and dont look back.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionPS. It was his parents who said they found the boxes on his bed, he didn't actually come home to find the boxes there himself. He is just going by what they said.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIt's incredible, he even had a box he was going to return because it was a wrong delivery, and that box is now missing, so he claims.
I called the delivery company and the woman just laughed at this and said there is no way they would ever enter an apartment and enter someone bedroom, and just take some boxes with them that would be for return, without anyone being there! That they also need a signature for most of their deliveries, and that they also call in advance. She also told me I might be best moving away from this room-mate because he didn't sound quite right in the head, lol.
But she couldn't help me track that particular order without the reference number, which my room-mate has. And he hasn't called them to check. I asked him to call them yesterday, but he hasn't yet.
He just moved in 3 days before leaving again, and now his parents arrived a day before him with even more of his stuff. It's quite likely that some of these boxes were overlooked/misplaced in the clutter. I've misplaced things when moving myself, it happens easily when you have your stuff laying scattered around. And with him having had a friend there those first 3 days to help unpack, and now both his parents there, and the landlord supposedly was there also those first three days, so there's been 5 people in that room moving things about! Funny how it's not any of them, it just HAS to be me... And I've never even been inside his room. How would I know what boxes he were to return and keep, and how would a random delivery man know??
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (24 June 2016):
Don't take it personally.
He does not know you that well, if you just moved, and he cannot know if you are or not a person who would lie, or who instead would take responsibility if some mishap had happened.
This is a weird, uneplainable thing !, and I think it's normal that a person finding boxes just popping up from nowhere on his bed , would think the most probabale reason is that the other apartment occupant must have got something to do with it somehow anyway.
The possibility you mention- that he got the delivery before leaving and he forgot- seems AS improbable to me AS the fact that the delivery man entered without you knowing, or something like that. I mean, unless he has Alzhaimer ! The apartment is tiny, the boxes were on his bed - how could he have forgotten ( unless maybe if he gets deliveries every single day ).
This is one of those weird things, I can't come up with an explanation. But neither can he, so that's why he is reluctant to take you at face value. I understand perfectly that you are offended by the implications ( that you are dangerously absentminded, that you are a busybody etc. ) but , then again, he does not know you , and what is he supposed to think ? As in the old thrillers the culprit was always the butler- when something goes wrong in a flatshare it's inevitable that the most suspect is the roommate. Even when he/ she is totally innocent.
If you ever find out what really happened- please update us and let us know !
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (24 June 2016):
 Quite frankly he sounds a bit nuts, lets be honest, it is very unlikely that you forgot to lock the door, allowing enter, who then locked the door on the way out ...... really?
Personally I would be quietly looking for a new place to live, unless of course, your housemate realises how silly his accusations are and offers some sort of apology.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2016): The landlord probably let him in and does not want to fess up because what the landlord did is illegal.
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