A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Been meeting up with a 30 year old guy lately in the city. We originally met through work contacts and have kept in touch. I fancied him straight away, he's gorgeous and very funny. I love how sophisiticated he is; he takes me for lovely dinners, we go for walks together and he just makes me feel incredible. He always compliments my choice in outfit and is always there to share a glass of wine with and a cuddle. We also had sex for the first time the other night and it was incredible. Thing is though, Im 18 - going to be 19 in a months time. Ive always been told im very mature for my age and I've always put it down to I had a difficult childhood and had to grow up quicker in order to cope. My interests are totally different to people my own age - I'm already in a succesful job, which has lead to being able to lead quite a comfortable life, and rather than going out drinking most nights, I'd rather go for dinner and then snuggle up back at home with this guy, who we shall call Robert. Because we've been becoming closer, and obviously now having sex, we're "stepping out" more in public, if you know what I mean. He's met a couple of my friends and none of my closest friends have said anything - my best friends are really thrilled I've met someone after a string of crap relationships, but I know a few of the friends who I perhaps don't know as well as others, have commented on the age gap. He's 30, and I'm almost 19. We havent really discussed the age gap, though when we first started dating, he said say he knew I was a lot younger than him but that it didn't bother him. It doesnt bother me either because the majrotiy of my friends are in their mid/late 20's anyways. Given the circumstances, do you think it matters? I know I shouldnt worry about what others think, but I do and just wondered what everyone thought. Is what we are doing wrong?
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female
reader, cottongin  +, writes (22 April 2008):
 age definitely does not matter. love is love, despite an age difference. go for it!!
A
female
reader, Astinson +, writes (20 April 2008):
 Heck no it is not wrong!! My fiance and I have an age gap too! I am 23 he is 37.. with a 17 year old son!! talk about feeling weird at first!! lol I say what ever makes you two happy, don't worry about what everyone thinks about it just what makes you two happy!! Shake them haters off!!!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2008): Just go for it and be happy, who gives a flying fig what other people say, i certainly dont, and i have been out witl all ages of blokes. Go for it.
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A
female
reader, lildeesbg +, writes (20 April 2008):
 It does seem that having to grow up fast at a young age has lead you to develop a mature outlook at 19. Which is wonderful and its good to see someone who had difficulties rise above. My outlook on the situation is that I cant see what a 30 year old man can have in common with a 18 year old. I understand that you are very mature for your age and have had strong life experiences. However, there are things that he went through that you havent yet due to longer life experiences. I have to wonder what his true intentions are. You might feel that you can relate to him, doesnt mean he feels the same.The following is a bunch of question I want you to ask your self and answer. How long did it take for you both to become intimate? What is he looking for? What are you ultimately looking for? Why at 30 years old is he single? What qualities does he see in you that make him feel connected with you? I write the above questions for you to think about in order to analyse the situation accordingly. I cant say this relationship is wrong, doomed or perfect. But I can input that you need to be aware of his and your motives. Remember that communication is important so utilize that and ask questions and really get to know him before youre so head over heels that you lose track of what can really be going on. As for what other people think you cant allow that to heavily weigh on your mind because their not in the relationship. However, whether good or bad it can becoming from a place of concern. (sometimes it does come from jealousy). As long as your happy for the right reasons, then thats all that matters. Sometimes age is just another and sometimes age isnt !!!~dee
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2008): Hi hun, your over the legal age of consent so the age gap is irrelevant so long as your both comfortable. My fiancee is 22 years older than me but it works because were both honest with each other. He sounds like a lovely man i hope your happy for as long as it lasts. x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2008): Hi Hunny
Are you happy? You certainly sound very happy...If you are then who cares about a number I'll let you in on a little secret SHHHHHH! Dont tell ok Im 45 my fiance is 23 and ive never in my whole life been more happy relationship wise, I've been through hell and back with abusive marriages and now Im treated with respect and like a princess..Why would I ever want that to go IM HAPPY!!!!(:0) YOU BE HAPPY WITH YOUR LOVELY NEW FELLA CONGRATS HUNNY YOU GO FOR IT WITH LOTS OF LOVE N HUGS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2008): Absolutely no reason that I can see that this relationship could possibly be deemed 'wrong'.You're happy, he's happy. We're all happy for you, aren't we aunts? !!!And if you ever hear snide comments to the contrary, put it down to jealousy. Some people hate to see others in a happy relationship. Long may it last. Good luck!
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