A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:my girlfriend stops me in the middle of sex frequently and says she is afraid she needs to pee. i hate to say it, but it's beginning to ruin the mood, as it's hard to get into it when she's stopping all the time.now don't get me wrong, i undertand that this happens sometimes, but it's all the time - whether i'm inside of her or going down on her or touching her with my hand - same result. she seems like she'll start to get into it, and then stop me and say she is afraid of peeing. i asked her if it was a comfort thing, concerned that maybe she was nervous or using that as an excuse because she's insecure. but she insists that's not it. she just swears that she is afraid she needs to pee. i've never had this problem before. does anyone know what may be going on here? i try to be as sweet and loving and understanding as possible, but it's starting to hurt my feelings that she won't let me finish. i definitely don't want to make her feel bad, but it's beginning to make me feel bad. opinions or advice? thanks in advance.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse  +, writes (30 January 2013):
 "I am the poster if this question. Thanks everyone for your feedback. I wanted to clarify one thing. I'm a girl, so there's absolutely no anatomical way my penis is hitting her in a bad angle. Lol."
Hahahahaha! Amazing reply!
"So thanks again, everyone, for your responses. They've all been very helpful."
No! Thank you for making my day brilliant!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2013): I am the poster if this question. Thanks everyone for your feedback. I wanted to clarify one thing. I'm a girl, so there's absolutely no anatomical way my penis is hitting her in a bad angle. Lol. Although I know that is true in instances with men and women sometimes. So thanks again, everyone, for your responses. They've all been very helpful.
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A
female
reader, randomgirl +, writes (29 January 2013):
It's a very simple solution; she needs to go to a doctor. Then you will have your answer; whether it's angle of penetration combined with her personal shape, a bladder infection or it could even just be nerves(if she's experienced the sensation once or twice before then it might all be in her mind and she's just scared of it happening so thinks she can feel it) whatever the outcome, don't pressure her into anything she's uncomfortable with although I can understand your frustration. Once a doctor has shone more light on the situation, then it may be time to ease her into trying things such as a towel and letting her know that it's okay if it did happen. Unless it is a bladder infection, in which case just wait for the medication to do it's job.
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A
female
reader, _Sandra_  +, writes (29 January 2013):
I've read a lot about such things: why do women want to pee more often than men? its not fair
BUT uterus(womb) weighs upon urinary bladder, so there's not so much place for bladder to widen. Thats why pregnant women go to pee very often! it depends though on different factors
Sooo.... 1. your gf better goes to pee before sex (lots of girls do so) 2. this feeling is caused by her orgasm coming up. she should let herdelf just relax and get satisfaction
ps CMMP's right o her bladder is empty there wont be any pee.
All the best and take care of your gf
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A
female
reader, R1 +, writes (29 January 2013):
 I often feel the need to pee during sex, I try and make sure I have a gap between my last drink and having sex and that I go to the toilet just before.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (29 January 2013):
 Could she have a bladder infection? Get her doctor to confirm she's normal anatomically and then follow So Very Confused's advice. Or try sex in the shower.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (29 January 2013):
Follow SVC's advice; I'd like to add that she may be a squirter. My wife is, and it can be messy, but I think it's great. She's not such a fan because it does make her feel like she has to go pee and she's a little worried she's going to pee on me. I don't find the idea of a little bit of accidental pee to be a big deal either.
Tell your gf that there's no way she'll pee if she goes before sex. It may be that she's going to squirt or orgasm. Tell her that even if it is pee (its not) that you'll be okay with that. But she's not allowed to get up until you're done having sex.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2013): I have never felt I have to go when I am going to orgasm, either alone or with someone, so I don't know where LazyGuy is getting his information from? Maybe it happens to other women but I have never experienced that. It's much more likely that it's caused by the angle of penetration and your penis putting pressure on her bladder. Maybe try her on top so she can control the depth/angle?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2013): It is often the angle of penetration that causes this - it has happened to me and it's not nice at all. I agree you should have her empty her bladder first, but I completely disagree with the posters who suggest putting a towel under her for 2 reasons: 1. It's a horrible sensation and it's unfair to expect her to keep going, and 2. I would NEVER dream of risking peeing in the middle of sex. I'd be mortified and it would completely ruin it for me. Try experimenting with the position and I'm sure it will improve.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (29 January 2013):
 have her empty her bladder just before you start having sex.
then put a nice thick towel under her and tell her... not to worry and to let go....
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2013): Let her pee beforehand. Then when she has that urge again while youre stimulating her, just know it has nothing to do with peeing. Let her relax and continue with the flow. She might really pee in the end, or she might squirt. It doesnt really matter as long as she reaches orgasm in the end.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (29 January 2013):
 The pre-lude to the female orgasm is often described as feeling the need/urge to pee.
Has she ever had an orgasm before? During masturbation?
Perhaps an option is to use some towels or do it in an area she doesn't need to worry and experience what happens if she continues. Maybe when she is alone so there is ABSOLUTELY no pressure?
It would be quite understandable if she doesn't want to pee all over the two of you during sex, that could be considered very embarrassing. Depending on what you are into.
And such fears do not have to be rational. She feels like she needs to pee and doesn't want to risk it happening. That is why she is asking you to stop.
So. Allow her, at her own pace to learn if she really needs to pee or if as I expect it just her orgasm building up. As aid, if she needs to be alone for that, let her find out on her own.
Maybe just point her to google with a query like "need to pee orgasm" to see what other women experience. She is hardly alone.
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