A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi , I know this is stupid but my mate hugged me and she smelt her boyfriend on me because I hugged him earlier and she went off on one sayin that I got off with him and Shes making a big deal about it. Today She rang after me and slapped me and tryed to punch me and strangle me!! Im soo depressed and I really want to be her mate but she wont listen to me and her boyfriend just goes along with itHow can I make her forgive me!?
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male
reader, AuntyChristine +, writes (16 May 2007):
Dear Anonymous,
I think you have a pretty big decision to make. Sometimes we all do things we wish we hadn't - even though I think your friend may have gone a little too far on this occasion.
I think you need to decide whether this is a friendship worth saving. If your mate is your best friend and you really can't imagine life without her, then I would start by writing her a letter. Explain everything that happened, how upset you are by everything that's happened since, and how much you would like to make up with her.
If she is still upset after she has read your letter, and still will not talk to you, then you are probably as well moving on and finding yourself some new friends.
We all fall out with our friends at some time and if you are true friends, then you will both, given a little time, be able to make up your differences and put this behind you. If your friend is unable to do this, then maybe she is not the friend you thought she was.
A
female
reader, stina  +, writes (16 May 2007):
 Hi Anonymous,
Dude - honestly I would forget about her. She's abusive and unwilling to talk about what happened. This is not how a friend behaves. A friend would want to talk to you and see what you have to say. A friend would NOT slap you, a friend would NOT punch you, and a friend would definitly NEVER try to strangle you.
Obviously she has some growing up to do. You sound much more mature than her. I suggest you find some friends that have personalities like your own - sane.
This relationship you have with her is unhealthy. And taking the abuse from this "friend" is totally unnecessary. Unless she is willing to apologize for her behavior, then I wouldn't talk with her again. And even if she does apologize, I'd probably not be as close with her.
Take care.
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A
female
reader, drbroz +, writes (16 May 2007):
 You cannnot make her forgive you.
You did not do anything wrong.
She is not your friend.
He is not your friend.
Find new friends.
Sometimes there are simple solutions to complex problems.
DrBroz
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