A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey, aunts and uncles,Just a quick question, lately I've been dreaming about my boyfriend cheating he's never cheated, but my dreams are making me think he is, I've had some wheres married and my best friend new I have children with him and.he's with another women just really weird dreams that are making me paranoid! ThanksAmy
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys, I spoke to my mum and she said the same, its just my friend had a dream like it and it was true her boyfriend was cheating on her, but it was just playing on my mind thank you
A
male
reader, RevMick +, writes (30 April 2014):
 Hi,
If you ever happen to look at a dream meaning book, you will see that they don't correlate to what happens in the dream.
For instance death in a dream, actually means something like a time of change. So your partner cheating though upsetting is probably a correlation to your insecurities about yourself or your own worth in the relationship.
You are only 18-21 so the chances are you are worried about the relationship, if he gets you as a person, he may be the first serious relationship you've had and all of those things can weigh on your mind.
I would say let the dreams be dreams, and when you wake up leave them behind.
Thanks for the question, and hope that helped a little.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (30 April 2014):
 Hi Amy, is this a recent thing? If the only thing that is troubling you are some weird dreams, and there is nothing going on in real life that would support this paranoia, I think the sensible thing to do is to change your sleep and health regimen.
Don't watch shows about cheating, if you are watching soaps or other programs, just switch to something more positive. I think the brain uses sleep to repair itself and that's why getting enough sleep is important. If you cut the cycle short, that's when things go wonky.
Don't watch TV in bed. Keep the bedroom for sleeping. Avoid screen time of smart phones or notebooks or other devices for an hour before going to sleep.
If you drink caffeinated beverages, avoid having any at least 6 hours before bedtime.
Are you exercising? Get some exercise in 3 or 4 times a week, brisk walking is fine but go out and do something. Join a gym if you are so inclined.
Avoid alcohol before going to bed, it may appear to help you fall asleep faster but it is terrible for allowing uninterrupted healing sleep.
Try cleaning up your sleep routine for a month and see if things don't change.
Talk to your doctor for more advice on this. Or here's a link that might help: http://www.nhs.uk/video/pages/sleep-problems-podcast.aspx
Start a sleep diary and track your dreams. Write things down as soon as you wake up.
http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/insomnia/Pages/bedtimeritual.aspx has some great tips for keeping your sleep healthy!
Come back in a month's time and let us know how things are going!
Best wishes.
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A
female
reader, Euphoric29  +, writes (30 April 2014):
Dear OP,
Dreams tell a story about you and your feelings, wishes, imagination.. but not about reality, as wiseowle already mentioned. Often, dreams have many meanings beside the obvious one, dreams talk in terms of symbols and images to you.
So if you dream your boyfriend is cheating, this might not be an actual warning that he is doing so. It might be a hint from your subconscious, that he is trying to become independent from you, because you are too possessive. Or that you've been overlooking something.
Or it might just be an imagery of your fear. I have dreams like that:
I am afraid of spiders. So whenever I am stressed out, I dream of venomous huge spiders that come to kill me. Also, I love my pets. Whenever I am stressed, I dream that I leave the house without feeding them and that I only realize it when they are starved to death. Does that mean this is going to happen to me? No, never happened. It's only a sign that I am scared of these things.
I hope you can adopt a similar view. By all means don't start accusing your boyfriend just because of this.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2014): My dear, just remember that dreams are formed in the imagination. They don't really have a true meaning, and are usually something deeply buried in our subconscious mind.
You are insecure about his feelings. Not sure he really likes you as much as you want him to. Afraid you are wasting your feelings, and he'll end up leaving you for somebody else. Maybe it happened before with someone else.
Ignore the dreams. Stop trying to add meaning to them, or base them in reality. That is not healthy, nor mature.
Here's a warning. If you don't have any evidence that he is cheating, DO NOT ACT OUT ON THESE SILLY DREAMS!!! You will make him angry at you, and he will leave you for sure.
You are young and you have to get the green-monster, "jealousy," under control. The dreams stem from your jealousy of his attention to other girls. He might be a flirt; or if he is good-looking, gets a lot of female attention. So this makes you very uncomfortable.
Act crazy, and you'll scare guys away. Stay cool and ignore the dreams. If he chose you as his girlfriend; it's because you are special above other girls he knows. Get clingy or possessive, and you will destroy every relationship with insecurity.
Time to learn to be a woman; and stop listening to the "little-girl" inside. She is trying to mess up your relationship. Scold her, and send her to her room!
Let the "woman" take full-control.
Growing up means allowing your adult-side to control irrational feelings and thoughts.
Base your actions and feelings on solid evidence, and what you know. Not on fact-less suspicion, or silly dreams.
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