A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am currently now 6 months pregnant and 21 yrs old. During the first 3 months of my pregnancy i felt completely alone. When my partner and i found out i was pregnant he thought i would "take care of the problem" but when he approached me about it, i just could not bring myself to do it. Thats when our problems started. He said i would get ugly and fat and that the baby would be retarded. Plus he wanted to buy a brand new $45,000 knowing i was pregnant. He said a baby would ruin him getting his car and that he was going to do it neway. He blew all his money on that car. He would yell at me and curse at me for keeping the baby. Like i had previously mentioned we were together for 5 yrs. I would have never expected for him to react that way. I have never felt more alone and neglected. There came a point were i just could not take nemore. So i broke it off. I told him we should go our own ways. And thats all it took for him to leave. Although i had the complete support of my family, things didin't feel rite. I felt alone and i fell into a depression those months i was alone were the most difficult moments of my life. One day after not hearing from my boyfriend for months he decided he wanted to work things out. He said he was going to change that he was going to show me things were going to be different. I was so alone i didn't really put up much of a fight. Needless to say we got back together. We were ok for the first few days. And then things went back to the way they were. Our anniversary came and we did nothing. Christmas passed he stopped by for a lil bit and left. The same for new years. Untill eventually i was lucky if i was him twice a week for an hour or 2. Unless u call him sleeping in the same room i'm in spending time together, we hardly had any. He lives with his grandparents who give him everything. His grandmother cleans his room and makes his food. Recently, they have gone on vaction and still i have spent no time with him. He hasn't invited me over and when i ask to spend the night with his he says he wants to be alone. He does work and started going to school. But on the rare occasions we can be together we are not. I don't know what to do nemore. hopefully someone will read this and give me some soild advise. I am so confused.
View related questions:
anniversary, christmas, got back together, grandmother, money Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, im_a_dummy +, writes (10 January 2009):
 awww hun... im sorry... im pregant too and my bf left me wen he found out and i know its really hard, but people are telling me, he is a jerk and get over him. i know you probably dont want to cuz you love him and thats how i feel, but its for the best and if your like me then you want wats best for the baby to come first right? well i think you should leave him... dont put up with it, you can have your families help and i can help as best as i can.
A
female
reader, MommyOfOne +, writes (10 January 2009):
 Three years ago, I went through something very similar... My then boyfriend said he wanted children, and when it actually happened, he began signing a different tune. He asked me on multiple occasions to abort the pregnancy and when I didn't, things went down hill... 10 weeks pregnant, my boyfriend emptied our apartment of furniture and everything else...saying that if I kept the baby, he was done. I stood my ground and moved home with my parents. I was devastated and heartbroken... I didn't hear from him until I tracked him down sometime in the 3rd trimester to tell him I was taking him to court for child support.I'm not going to lie. It was the hardest thing to go through. A pregnancy alone. Labor and delivery with my best friend and parents, but no father. The first few months of parenthood alone. Everything alone. But let me tell you, it has made me such a stronger woman. I would never wish this on my worst enemy. This is going to be a hard road, but you CAN make it. You can raise that baby in an amazing fashion and be the best mom. You don't NEED him. Keep your head up. Keep moving forward. It really does get better and easier.I would recommend taking him to court and getting an order for child support. I would start the case NOW before the baby is born. (That's advice I was given when I was pregnant, but waited until my daughter was 9 months before petitioning the case. Bad choice.) I would end the relationship. Telling him to come talk to you when he has grown up a little.This boy doesn't sound like a healthy role model for a child. Much like my daughters father. Fathers like this can actually cause more damage than good to children. Please sit back and think if this is the kind of person you want to be with...
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for your advise.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2009): hello hope all is going well with your pregnancy.so listen here those kind of men are what i call donors i have one of them also.i was 15 and we stayed together for a little while afterwards but his life and friends were more important. you have a gift from god so cherish it.you will have the best part of him so move on life doesnt end just because you become a mother it begins a new one. you will learn to cope and with your family backing u up youll be fine you dont need him.sounds to me he would choose something for himself instead of diapers if he was down to his last 10 bucks. good luck sweetie and god bless you everything will be fine i promise dont take his crap x
...............................
|
